Grab a Pen

ON BEING A REAL WRITER

2011-12-13T01:20:00.000-08:00

every other day i would look at this blog and think.. gahh, i really need to post something. i should do that. i need to do that. i should probably say something, especially now that my book is out. now that my book is out i should really, really probably maybe say something.

but i didn't know what to say.

this has been one hell of a ride, all of this. it's been scary and terrifying and really scary and very terrifying and it's been more fun than i've ever had in my life. i have so many FEELINGS about things now, but, even though technically i call myself a writer, i seem to have lost all the words needed to write them down.

i feel a little different now. like if i were a tin can and you shook me you'd hear some stray piece rattling around inside of me, clanging and making it known to the world that a part of me has come loose. because it's true. a part of me has come loose. a part of me is now printed on 338 pieces of paper and has been placed on a shelf for all to see. so i feel kind of funny about that.

i forget, all the time, for example, that people can just walk into a bookstore and buy my book. i get calls and texts and emails and messages from old friends, distant family members, that one lady i met at a dinner party 3 years ago who somehow has my phone number. they say wonderful, wonderful things like "omg i just bought your book!!!! congratulations!!! this must be so exciting for you!!!!!" and unfortunately, my immediate reaction is generally something like "OHHHH, RIGHT, THAT, HEYYY, YEAHHH LOLOL, MAYBE, LISTEN, YOU DON'T HAVE TO LIKE IT OR ANYTHING, WE CAN STILL BE FRIENDS IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT OR ANYTHING OKAY GTG TTYL" and then i stick my phone in the freezer.

i meet people and they say things like "omg i just googled you!"
i say goodbye to people and they say things like "omg i'm going to google you!"

i'm not exactly sure what people hope to impart when they say these things to me; no doubt they think they're complimenting me in some way, and so i try to be cool about it and manage to nod and smile and before pulling a paper bag over my head. because in truth, these exclamations make me want to go home and hide all my google-bits and build a blanket-fort under my desk and live there for the next 10 years.

but then (!)

just as i've put the finishing touches on my hermit-nest (!)

i'll get a really wonderful email from a reader that makes me so happy that for a moment, i don't even mind that my google is showing. i'll put pants on that day and actually leave my house and maybe squint in the face of natural light for a little while, and then i'll pay too much money for a cup of coffee and haul myself to a bookstore. there, i will inevitably find myself in front of the Young Adult section, standing there in my unbearably self-conscious skin, wild-eyed and crazed, suddenly acutely aware of just how much my google is showing and convinced that at any moment, someone is going to pop out of the aisles and accuse me of vanity. seriously. i can't even make eye contact with my own book. i see it and dart in the other direction because i'm afraid someone will catch me admiring it, and oh, god, how terrible that would be, and i really hope that never happens, because that would be so embarrassing i think i would just die a little bit, right there on the spot.

so yeah. this is what i've been doing. trying to learn how to be gracious about these kinds of things. i'm trying to learn how to stop laughing when people compliment my book (apparently this does little in the way of advancing sales); i'm trying to learn how to roll myself in bubble-wrap every day before waddling over to the internet where i carefully avoid all sites save shoe stores, tumblr, and netflix; i'm trying to learn how to eat solid food on a regular basis (apparently a diet of coffee and chocolate will kill me prematurely); and i'm trying to learn how to blog again. i swear, you'd think i've just told you i've been in a serious car accident and i'm going through physical therapy. ugh, melodramatic much.

the doctor has full faith that one day i will blog again, friends.

but really, of all of the things i've experienced, the strangest thing thus far has been this... this, i don't know, this stamp-of-approval that people find on my forehead. and even though i check the mirror every day and still haven't found it yet, people keep insisting that it's there.

overnight, i went from being "a writer" to A Writer.

i tell people i write books and they look at me like i've said something remotely amusing, like i've said something in another language that, roughly translated, actually means "i couldn't get a real job." it's only when they realize that i have an actual book in an actual bookstore that they suddenly look at me like "oh, god, i totally thought for a second that you were one of those loser 'writers' who hasn't actually published anything, lolol, my bad, my bad, you're cool, carry on." and oh, it's so gross, guys. i hate it so much. i hate the implication that you can't be a real artist without having sold something. i hate that we don't appreciate struggling artists until they've "made it," i hate that writers aren't appreciated until they're "published," i hate that musicians are pitied until they "get that record deal." because there's no such thing as a stamp-of-approval. and i hope you guys know that.

i hope you know that if you write? if you write with heart and soul and passion, you will always be a writer. you will always be an artist. and i hope you'll never let those disapproving, disappointed looks affect you. i hope you know that no one can tell you what it means to be a "real writer," especially not some random guy who knows nothing about who you are and all you've struggled to achieve.

anyway. i just wanted to say it's good to be among friends. my writer and reader-friends. you're all awesome. if you read books, please keep on reading them. and if you write books, please keep on writing them. because i can't wait to buy them.

i hope you're all doing so well. i've missed talking to you.

<3

OFFICIAL SHATTER ME BOOK TRAILER

2011-11-08T11:44:00.000-08:00

it's here! it debuted yesterday on MTV's Hollywood Crush, but they had an exclusive on it so i couldn't post it anywhere until just now. but yay! here it is, all pretty for everyone to see.

6 more days, guys!

i am sort of terrified.

I MISS YOU GUYS

2011-10-25T13:44:00.000-07:00

i feel like i haven't talked to you in ages!

how ARE you? how've you been?? how's the writing? are the cats still climbing all over your keyboard? are you getting enough coffee every day? what about chocolate? are you eating enough chocolate?

things are crazy crazy over here. but i'm sure you already knew that. if i'm leaving the house it's pretty much to catch a plane or to run an errand and i've been shopping online so much lately that i now officially have my credit card number memorized. (i still haven't decided whether or not i'm delighted by the efficiency of this new development or horrified by how easy this makes it for me to buy things online.)

one of these days i'm actually going to sit down and write a real blog post that has some kind of useful information in it, but for now it seems i'm destined to tell you stories about not being able to find my pants (my mother bought me 3 sets of pajama bottoms after i wrote that post -- not even kidding -- and told me to keep them with me at all times) or about nothing, really, at all.

mostly i'm just checking in to say hi. (hi hi!) i also have some updates re: book stuff, but i'll shove that in at the end somewhere.

here are some things i have been doing lately:

1. eating a lot of peanuts. they are very nice, peanuts. crunchy and full of protein, apparently. though, full disclosure: i think i prefer them dipped in chocolate. i actually sat next to an extraordinarily charming lady on the plane who told me about her son and his severe allergy to peanuts. she can't even touch peanuts and be near him without him going into anaphylactic shock. the stewardess then chose that exact moment to give us little bags of peanuts which, apparently, they still do on some flights, and i was really hungry so i ate mine and felt tremendously guilty the whole time. i think i needed to confess that to someone.

2. watching modern family. oh my god. my new favorite show ever. everrrrrr

3. pining for Mindy Kaling's (she plays 'Kelly' on The Office) memoir, IS EVERYONE HANGING OUT WITHOUT ME? um, so, Mindy Kaling is the epitome of hilarious and i'm really into funny-lady memoirs lately. i read BOSSYPANTS recently (Tina Fey) and i cried i laughed so hard. so super excited about this book.

4. i may or may not have fangirled Brian Selznick at SCIBA last weekend. i was so giggly and awkward and he was so classy and he was wearing gold shoes! gold shoes, guys. also i got 2 copies of WONDERSTRUCK signed. one of them is for YOU! i'll be giving that away at some point.

5. apparently i'm going to be on TV in Mumbai. i know, right? random and awesome. this Mumbai television station did a quick segment on me at NYCC. if i ever get a link i'll share it with you guys.

6. mmmmmm that's kind of it, actually. just been doing a lot of pre-pub stuff. lots of traveling, meeting super cool people, missing all of you, trying not to think about the fact that SHATTER ME is coming out in 20 days (oh good god) and trying to remember to do that thing where i sleep when the sun goes to China.

gah! speaking of book stuff. i've gotten a ton of questions about which/what formats SHATTER ME will be available in, as well as when they'll be released.

so. here are some Things To Know:

SHATTER ME will be available in the following formats, and
they'll all be available on November 15, 2011.

1. US Hardcover (self-explanatory!)

2. International Edition (which is issued in paperback, in English, and will be available in certain open territories like Canada, Singapore, Malaysia, and across the Middle East (UAE, Bahrain, Qatar, Jordan, Egypt, etc.)

3. Audio Book (WMA and Audible)

4. E-book (Nook, Kindle, iBookstore, etc.)

andddddddd as an

4. ENHANCED E-book. the Enhanced E-book is basically the swanky version of a regular E-book. the EEB comes with the full text of the novel, plus a ton of bonus material -- behind the scenes stuff: the official book trailer, police files, medical records, "Persons of Interest" profiles, propaganda posters, and an entry from the personal log of the antagonist in the book. so it's basically a more comprehensive, interactive look at the story.

i hope that info helps clarify some things.

SO. what are you guys up to? read any good books lately?

<3 <3 <3

FEELING A LITTLE WEEPY

2011-10-18T15:22:00.000-07:00

so, there were a bunch of things i was going to update you on today, but i think that's going to have to wait until tomorrow. because i just got finished copies of SHATTER ME in the mail and i'm feeling a little weepy.

and i thought i'd share them with you.

this one is sitting in my editor's office!

sorry it's kind of blurry.

this is a shot of the US hardcovers and the international paperback editions. to date, SHATTER ME has sold in 20 territories (where it'll be translated and repackaged for each), but it'll also be available in certain open territories as an international edition in places like Canada, Singapore, Malaysia & across the Middle East (UAE, Bahrain, Qatar, Egypt, Jordan, etc). the international edition is always a paperback -- it looks very similar to the ARC, actually.

i'm feeling all kinds of emotional right now. i really didn't think it would hit me this hard, seeing the final copy in my hands like this, but it's pretty damn surreal. i can't wait to share the book with you, and i can't wait for you to be able to see it for yourselves. the interior details are so innovative and gorgeous and i'm just blown away by all that Harper has done.

i think i might go cry a little now.

big big hugs.

SHATTER ME LAUNCH PARTY!!

2011-10-11T18:01:00.000-07:00

THE DETAILS ARE FINALLY HERE!!

the launch party will be held in Aliso Viejo, CA (which is about 2 miles from Laguna Beach, just to give you an idea of the area) and this event is very near and dear to my heart because it's being hosted by my alma mater. (the tiny little liberal arts college i've always talked about!) they've been kind enough to take care of all the details of this event and they're opening it up to the public for everyone to attend -- so if you come, you'll get to see where i went to college! and you'll get to meet my whole family and my professors and my classmates and really, it'll be like some quasi-family reunion, so, hm, maybe you're not into that at all, actually, but either way! i really hope you can come! there will be yummy food and i will probably have to talk about book stuff and i'll sign things and i'll get to hug you guys and finally say hello in person! :D :D

if you can make it, please RSVP (or leave a comment if you don't have Facebook!) on the official Facebook event page (LINK HERE!) so that we can have an accurate tally for how much food (and how many books!) we should order.

HOPEFULLY I WILL SEE YOU GUYS IN NOVEMBER!

AHHHHHHHHHHH I SHOULD PROBABLY GO BUY A NEW OUTFIT OR TWENTY

heart heart heart

SHATTERDAY IS COMING

2011-10-10T09:56:00.000-07:00

i am back from the first leg of my travels!
what does that even mean, anyway! the first leg! it sounds ridiculous!

okay total digression here, but am i the only one who gets idioms confused? i tend to say things like "that just flew right around my head!" and "it's like i've been living under a cave or something!" and "don't fill all your eggs with one basket!" and i don't know, but somehow my words of wisdom tend to go unappreciated.

anywho!

i'm back for a bit before i leave for NYC this weekend (COMICCON! you are coming, yes? OF COURSE YOU ARE! you should totally come to THIS THING WHERE I WILL BE ahem ahem.)

but i have a couple of things to tell you before i disappear again:

after much deliberation, the details of the SHATTER ME launch party have been finalized. i will have more information for you very soon (next week at the latest), but! if you are anywhere in and/or around the Southern California area and you are interested in attending, please save the date for November 16th! (the book releases on the 15th, but the launch party will be held on the 16th.) and you're all invited! it will be fun times, i tell you. you'll get to meet my mom.
SHATTERDAY IS ALMOST HERE! so. Shatterday is one of the very exciting things that Harper has created in anticipation of the release. it's on a SATURDAY (get it? SATURDAY? SHATTERDAY? i lolled with glee when i first figured that out) -- October 22nd, to be exact. and all the details are on the official FB page. it's a 24-hour online event offering exclusive previews from the book (chapter reveals every hour), amazing giveaways, and a Livestream-thing with yours truly. i don't actually know what a Livestream-thing is, on account of i've never done one before, but i think it involves me talking into a camera. live. anyhow! maybe, if you like, you could attend? :D
the first chapter of SHATTER ME is online! i don't really have many coherent words for this. only that it feels like someone has pulled my pants down in front of everyone and i am smiling a lot and trying to ignore the fact that my pants have been pulled down in front of everyone. if you want to read it, you can find it here. ahhhhhhhhhhhh

that is all the things for now!

i think!

but holy crap guys, the book is out in a little more than a month.

please excuse me while i go search for my brains, they seem to have fallen out somewhere.

I'M A BIG FAN OF THE WORD 'ETCETERA'

2011-09-28T10:12:00.000-07:00

holy crap i've been a bad blogger.

these past couple of months have been wonderful and amazing, but i can honestly say, with zero hyperbole, that i have never been busier in my entire life. and i mean, really, it makes you wonder what the hell i've been doing for the past 23 years if i have nothing to compare this to. but there it is. embarrassing truth and all.

i remember back before i had a book deal i used to read posts from published authors about their hectic schedules and these crazy deadlines they were always attempting to meet and everyone always seemed to be so tired and brain-pooped. it was buckets of sweat and frenzied eyes and DEADLINES! I HATE YOU, DEADLINES! I HATE YOU! DIE, DEADLINES, DIE! and i remember thinking, well damn, what i wouldn't give to have a deadline. i'd exclamation-point the crap out of it.

so it's strange.

i love my deadlines. i want to dip them in my tea and wear them around my neck and tuck them into bed at night. i want to knit them little pajama sets and take them to disneyland. if i ever complain about having deadlines i hope someone punches me in the face. so this is not a post about deadlines. it's not a post about anything specific. it's just an explanation that you probably don't even need (because you are very wise, very kind, very forgiving readers) about where i've been.

so basically, about 8% of the time i'm working on book stuff, and 92% of the time i'm trying to find my pants.* because really, true story, the mailman is always ringing my doorbell and i'm always like SORRYSORRYONESECONDPLEASE and i'm hopping around on one socked foot while trying not to slip on hardwood floors and running around like WAIT, I SWEAR, I LEFT MY HOUSE LAST WEEK I COULD'VE SWORN I HAD PANTS ON THEN

and the mailman is always like, um, yeah, ma'am? i'm just going to leave this outside the door.

(my life is so glamorous, guys. you can't even handle it.)

so that is where i've been. book stuff, pants stuff. i've also spent an extraordinary amount of time just staring at the dishes in my sink, wondering how on earth they got there and why they refuse to wash themselves. also, lately i've been buying most of my socks just to avoid doing laundry. it's kind of sad. @tanagandhi is always trying to be a good friend and she makes valiant efforts to dissuade me from taking the lazy way out, but i have to admit, i'm tempted every single day to buy a 24-pack of those really ugly men's sport socks from Costco. i figure 24 pairs of socks means i can spend more time on tumblr and less time measuring laundry detergent into a cup.

though i should probably stop confessing these things to you.

i mean, you guys? i trust. but my mom reads this blog and whenever i talk about things like not doing my laundry, i always ALWAYS get a call from her like "THAT IS DISGUSTING I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU HAVEN'T DONE YOUR LAUNDRY I AM SO DISAPPOINTED IN YOU I'M COMING OVER RIGHT NOW AND YOU BETTER HAVE TEA"

ahem.

basically though, i'm going to be traveling pretty much all of October. i'm barely going to be at home at all next month, which means i have to solve my pants and laundry situation before i go. it also means that i will probably continue to be a terrible blogger. in fact, if i'm being honest, i'll have to admit i'm probably going to be a terrible blogger... for a while. ahhhh i am cringing so hard right now.

but! here is some good news. i might not be on the tinterwebs, but, maybe you can come see me in person! because if you're going to be at the New York Comic-Con the weekend of October 13th, I WILL BE THERE! and you can come find me and my pants on a panel on Friday morning (details here), and then i'm doing a signing (giving away ARCs) at the HarperCollins booth shortly after (12:30-1:30pm). (AND YOU SHOULD TOTALLY COME! IT'LL BE LIKE I HAVE FRIENDS!)

speaking of book stuff, there are so many exciting things coming up in October in preparation for the SHATTER ME launch, so if you're ever curious, Harper has set up an official FB fanpage that they update regularly with teasers, upcoming info, and Other Very Cool Things that will be happening very soon. so there is that, too.

bottom line: there is a lot of stuff. but i just wanted to say thanks for being so patient with me. thanks for being so amazing and so supportive and thanks for all the tweets, the emails, the tumblr and facebook messages. thanks to all of you who've contacted me to let me know you've pre-ordered the book or reviewed it or even just entered contests to win it. you guys make this journey so much more fun. every single day i'm so ridiculously happy that the internet brought us together.

one last thing? i hope you know i haven't forgotten about you on this blog; the truth is i'm just afraid of putting out mediocre content. i still tweet pretty much every day, though. that's mediocre content allllllll dayyyyyy longgggg.

hehe.

heart you guys so much.

*i had to use a calculator to figure that out.

YOU ARE MY PEOPLE

2011-09-14T11:07:00.000-07:00

so here's the thing - telling people you're a writer is, in a lot of ways, a really fascinating experience.

the reactions are mixed. there's a lot of Oooohhhh! Is it about Vampires? Sexy sexy vampires? and Oh, that's so interesting, do you have a book out yet? and Well what do you write? What's the story about?

(side note: if you ever hope to be able to answer those last two questions, you should start kissing the people who force you to write really amazing query letters. because a one-sentence pitch? a two-sentence summary? a 250-word synopsis? those suckers have made my life infinitely less-complicated.)

but of all the raised eyebrows and wide eyes and slow nods and furrowed brows, the most interesting reactions thus far (for me) have been from people who are inspired by my admission to tell me secrets of their own.

mmm hmmm.

i am always shocked by the number of people who tell me that they, too, are writing a book.

it's kind of the same, each time. after the usual "oh, you're writing a book, la dee da, so nice for you, sexy vampires sexy sexy hurr hurr i saw that movie with the stephen mayers and he he he" and the solemn author response of "well, yes, i saw that movie too, but not all books are about vampires and anyway, i'm going to just smile and pretend that you, fine sir, are the first person to ever make a funny about YA novels and vampires because i do not wish to insult your person," the conversation will somehow make a left turn into the life story of the Person You Are Speaking With.

and they will admit that they are writing a book.

at this point i usually find myself quite pleased and rather excited. i know all too well how difficult it is to make that kind of admission, and it's always nice to find a fellow writer in a body you least expect. almost all of my writer friends live exclusively in the internet (i hope you're not too cramped in there) and when i meet Our Kind outside of the worldwide webs, i tend to get a little OH MY GOD YOU'RE ONE OF US FLAILY HANDS hey why don't we sit and swap query horror stories over a hot cup of something caffeinated??

but the thing is, it never gets there.

because their very first question (after telling me that they've written a book/are writing a book/are thinking about writing a book/have always wanted to write a book) is always "So how do you get a book published?"

and that's when i take a deep breath and paste on a bracing smile and hand out links to Janet Reid and Nathan Bransford's blogs. they ask me if i "knew someone" or if "someone taught me the ropes" and i wish i had something really Cool and Exciting to say but i all i can do is shrug. shake my head. say "nope. i just googled the crap out of it."

and it got me thinking.
about you.
about all of you.

about how hard you work every single day to learn this industry. how you spend hours and hours away from your family, your responsibilities, your sweet, sweet bed, just to figure out how to do this right. you ask a million questions about first lines, first paragraphs, first pages. you wonder about Inciting Incidents and Character Arcs and the minute details of how to format your query letter. you send frantic emails to your crit partners and fill writer forums with questions like does the word count go at the beginning or at the end? do i tell them i'm querying multiple projects? does it have to be exactly one page? will i get auto-rejected for a typo if i SON OF A MOTHERLESS GOAT I SPELLED QUERY WRONG PLEASE GOD SOMEONE JUST SHOOT ME IN THE FACE

you are incredible.

you are so dedicated. and i'm reminded in every experience i have with writers outside of this community that you guys are so so so far ahead of the game. you are in the top percentile. you are in the very tiny minority of writers who are thisclose to achieving your dreams.

you're doing it right. you're doing everything right. and it might take some time, but you're going to get there. i know you will.

and i wanted to say thanks for always being there for me. i don't know where i'd be if it weren't for this community. not sure what wrong turn i would've made. but you guys are priceless. the blogs you maintain, the forums you frequent, the support you offer one another -- it's priceless.

i'm so grateful for all of you.
thank you.

<3

DON'T BE AFRAID TO WRITE A BAD BOOK

2011-09-06T09:56:00.000-07:00

Anonymous asked...

Whenever I sit down to write, I'm overwhelmed by the ideas in my head; I'm constantly distracted. I can't figure out which story to write, and I keep asking myself: What if I'm working on something that's going to go nowhere? What if I'm choosing the wrong idea? So I'd love to know: How do you know, when you sit down to write a book, that the concept you choose is going to pay off? How do you know it's going to be the right thing to focus on? I hope this question makes sense.

i really sympathize with this feeling. and i understand your need to get it right on the very first try -- i really, really do. but here's the problem: writing a novel is difficult enough without the added (stressful!) expectation of it needing to be The Next Big Thing. we can't manufacture that kind of success.

that's why you have to allow yourself the luxury of writing for the sake of writing -- writing because you love to do it, because you're having fun with your characters, because you lie awake at night thinking about what might happen to them while you're gone. because ultimately, published or unpublished, every single manuscript you write will be invaluable to your efforts.

every single story you write will help you to hone your craft.

you can't be afraid of your own creative efforts. don't fear failure. don't be afraid of being the person who needed to write a ton of crappy manuscripts and had to burn through a few agents before landing a book deal. because i'm going to tell you a secret? regardless of how it might seem in and around the blogging world and twitterfeeds and facebook posts and the ever-lovely publishers marketplace, the majority of us (read: the vast, vast majority of us) did not sell the very first thing our eager fingers ever created. many of us had to write not 1, but 2, 3, 15 manuscripts before figuring out what worked. a debut novel just means it's the first novel an author has ever published -- not the first they've ever written.

and that's okay.

in fact, if you screw things up it just means you're perfectly normal.

so take a risk. be open to writing a book that will undoubtedly embarrass you in a few years. go nuts with the adverbs and scatter plot holes everywhere and make your characters say things like i know we just met, but do you believe in destiny? and then he kissed my mouth and i breathed on his face and hugged him goodnight romantically. really. go ahead and fall in love with your hero for no reason except that he is the hero and, well, you made him, so there's obviously no need to flesh out his character. dispense with the motivations and the proper pacing and give your protag a crazy name and a plethora of ridiculous backstories. have every near-catastrophic event solved by coincidence and magical powers that show up only when it's most convenient, and then kill everyone off at the end because it's the only way you know how to finish the book. write the story that's really nothing more than a thinly-veiled effort at fictionalizing what otherwise would've been your autobiography.

really.

but whatever you do, don't be afraid. never be afraid of writing the wrong thing. because in the end, all of it will help you learn. all of it will help you grow as a writer. so choose whichever story you want; choose all of them if you prefer. but don't ever sabotage yourself by getting stuck in analysis paralysis. don't freak yourself out. don't think you're the only one who's ever had this problem and don't feel like you'll never be able to move past it.

the words get easier the moment you stop fearing them.

we've all been there.
i know you'll get through it, too.

ARCs of CROSSED, LOLA, & SHATTER ME: WINNERS!

2011-08-23T13:34:00.000-07:00

SOOOOOOO...

wow. yeah. we had 918 comments on the contest entry post. which is amazing. and... really awesome.

and i figured 3 prizes for 900+ people didn't really make good odds of winning for anyone. so! i'm giving away 3 more ARCs of SHATTER ME, for a total of 6 winners! hehe.

ANDDDDD

ahem ahem. the winners are as follows:

1. ARC of CROSSED + ARC of SHATTER ME:

The Chronicles of an Enamored Soul

2. ARC of LOLA & THE BOY NEXT DOOR + ARC of SHATTER ME:
reutreads

3. ARC of SHATTER ME:
Safari Poet

ANDDDDDD... 3 extra ARCs of SHATTER ME go to:
The Midnight Bookworm
Ravishing Reads
Owl Love You Books

CONGRATULATIONS, GUYS!!
winners! if you would please email me your mailing addresses
at thmafi at gmail dot com, i'll send off your books as soon as possible.

i'm sorry i don't have any more ARCs to give away right now, but i might host one last tiny contest before SHATTER ME comes out (almost 2.5 months now!). but! in the interim, Harper is actually hosting an awesome giveaway on Goodreads where they're giving away TWENTY COPIES.

CLICKY CLICKY TO ENTER.

so, now that all of that is taken care of, i can safely say that i am quite sleepy, my friends. in fact, i don't think i've ever been busier in my entire life and i don't even know when it happened. it is all WONDERFUL! and really exciting! and i'm plowing through edits and i'll be traveling a lot soon and i'm working on some sekrit projects (!!) and Harper has all of these unbelievably bananas awesome Things (!!) planned for SHATTER ME and i can't wait to share it all with you! but oh, if i had hermione's time-turner right now, i would time-turner the crap out of it. that would be nice. hmm. you're not going to drink that latte, are you?

thanks.

I MISS YOU GUYS!

see you very soon.

HEART HEART HEART

BOOK JACKETS!!!!!!!

2011-08-10T13:39:00.000-07:00

(my goodness this hiatus really isn't working out for me, is it?)

THEY ARE SO SHINY I DON'T KNOW IF YOU CAN SEE THE SHINY

oh my how did this get there i don't know i just hmmmmmmmmmm

this is not a million percent final yet, but it is PRETTTTYYY DARNNNN CLOSEEE

!!!
eep.

WIN LOLA & THE BOY NEXT DOOR, CROSSED, & SHATTER ME

2011-08-08T23:16:00.000-07:00

that's right, guys. i promised you a contest, and i'm going to deliver.

CROSSED and LOLA & THE BOY NEXT DOOR are two hotly-anticipated upcoming novels, and i have ARCs (Advance Reader Copies) that i'm very excited to share with you. i also just got a VERY SHINY new box of SHATTER ME ARCs (with jacket art (!!)) that i'd like to throw into the pot! for you! all for youuuuu!! :D :D

see here:

so. we have THREE PRIZE PACKS to give away here.

1. ARC of CROSSED + ARC of SHATTER ME

2. ARC of LOLA & THE BOY NEXT DOOR + ARC of SHATTER ME

3. ARC of SHATTER ME

you guys know the drill, right? we've done this before. it's super simple.

random.org is going to choose 3 winners, and to be eligible, all you have to do is leave a comment telling me you want to win.

that's it.

promotion is not necessary! but if you do tweet or blog or myface or spacebook or tumblr or bake a cake filled with feelings and declarations of your truest true love, please let me know in the comments.

+1 for every time you link to this contest on your twitter, facebook, etc. (up to 5 extra entries!)
+2 if you link to this post on your blog.
(please leave links so i can find them)

THAT'S IT! easy, right?

my contests, as always, are definitely absolutely international, and the contest will end

NEXT WEDNESDAY, August 17th, 2011 at 11:59 PST.

HAPPY TUESDAY, EVERYONE!

and happy winning. he he.

HEARTS!

I HAVE ARCS WITH COVER ART OMG OMG

2011-08-08T13:52:00.000-07:00

INTERRUPTING THIS HIATUS TO SHARE SOME EXCITING PICTURES WITH YOU!

ahem ahem.

we have gone from this:

to this:

NEW ADVANCE READER COPIES SQUEAK

i am dying a little bit right now.

because they are SHINY. and embossy. and SO PRETTY.

*RUNS AROUND*

happy monday, my friends.

happy happy monday.

CONTEST SOON.

TEMPORARY HIATUS

2011-07-28T11:48:00.000-07:00

so i've never done this before, ever, in the year and a half that i've been blogging, but i think it's finally time for me to take a real break.

that's right, dear friends. i'm going to take the month of August off. i'm getting a new set of edits for book 2 and i plan on holing up in a cave to focus my energy on writing. i won't be completely cut-off from the internet (you'll very likely be able to find me on twitter), and i might pop in occasionally when there's an announcement to be made, but i won't be blogging regularly. (though let's be honest, i've been a bad blogger these past couple of weeks, haven't i?)

there are so many things happening! and it's making it hard for me to balance everything as i'd like. i've been traveling a lot, and i will be traveling a lot all through the end of this year. a lot of it is book-related, but some of it is also personal-related, in that my friends and i can always be found exploring new cities when time and wallets permit. but the thing about traveling is that it takes up a lot of time. also energy. i came back from comiccon, for example, feeling like someone had paid a giraffe to kick me in the eye, punch me in the shins, and insult my entire extended family.

this is an interesting time for me, a time that comes with a lot of transitions and new experiences and millions of things to learn and understand and prioritize. i'm busier than i've ever been and i'm loving every moment, but i'm getting a bit tired, and i think i have to shift priorities for a short while.

so this is not goodbye! it's merely an emotional hand-wave and a promise that i will see you soon, but not every day as i'd have liked.

what about you? do you ever feel like you need to take a break?

so many hearts, my friends.

<3 <3 <3

A COUPLE OF THINGS

2011-07-20T10:48:00.000-07:00

heyyyyyy guys!

i've been a bit out of the blogging-world this week, and i'm not sure why. probably because i've been reading too much and too late into the night and it's made me too tired to blog. it is shameful, this book-gluttony. shameful! and yet, i'm not ashamed at all. he he

BUT, not to worry. i promise we will be back to our normal programming shortly. in the interim, here are some Things To Know!

1. COMIC-CON. i'm going to be on the panel "What's Hot in Young Adult Fiction: Sit Down with the Writers We Can't Stop Talking About"on Sunday, 10:00-11:00am. Room 23ABC

It's going to be hosted by Nathan Bransford (Jacob Wonderbar Cosmic Space Kapow), and features other awesome author-panelists Andrea Cremer (Nightshade series), Amanda Hocking (Hollowland), Stephanie Perkins (Anna and the French Kiss), Laini Taylor (Daughter of Smoke and Bone), and Kiersten White (Paranormalcy).

We're doing an autographing session afterward from 11:30am - 12:30pm in room AA4, where i'll be signing ARCs of SHATTER ME. (for you! to take! TAKE THEM ALL! buahaha)

i won't be getting into the convention until around noon on Saturday (i'm running another 5k that morning and literally jumping into the car in my gym clothes), so i'll probably be wandering the floor a bit in the afternoon on both Saturday and Sunday.

if you're going to be around either Saturday or Sunday, let me know! i'd love to say hi!

2. QUESTIONS. if you have any writing-related questions, feel free to leave them in the comments (or shoot me an email) and i'd be happy to answer them on the blog.

3. DUN DUN DUN. i'm probably going to be diving into an edit cave of isolation in August (to work on polishing and plumping Book 2), and i'm thinking it might make me a little bad with the blogging. SO. would you guys be interested in doing guest posts?

HEARTS!

<3

JUST A REMINDER

2011-07-18T10:23:00.000-07:00

this is your dream.

happy monday, dear friends! <3

SHATTER ME COVER REVEAL, A FEW THOUGHTS

2011-07-15T09:16:00.000-07:00

hey guys!

first, i just wanted to say thank you so, so so much for all the tweets and messages and blog posts and crazy-incredible mind-blowing support and enthusiasm from yesterday's cover reveal. it means more to me than you could know. i never realized that sharing a cover could be so nerve-wracking, but really, it's kind of like you're sharing your book's face with the world for the first time and hoping people won't tell you your child is ugly. i spent most of yesterday holding my breath.

thank you for making it easier for me. <3

second, i wanted to share the cover on my blog yesterday, but the awesome people at MTV had a 24-hr exclusive on it (full article here), so i had to wait until now. but here it is, the final cover of SHATTER ME:

click to enlarge

and i love it.

the raw and uneven strike-outs in both the tagline and the title text, the lights and darks in the background, the fact that she's gripping her dress so you can't see her hands, and even (and i'd say especially) the very dress she's wearing are all so, so critical to the story and i'm unbelievably grateful to both Harper, for working so tirelessly to make this right, and to our incredible photographer, Aurora Crowley, whose light-painting techniques are UNREAL in their beauty.

SHATTER ME is a story about hope, about love, about looking within ourselves and finding both light and dark, strength and weakness, and struggling to be more than the labels pressed upon us by society. it's about a girl trying to find herself in a world trying to tell her who to be. and i really think this cover conveys so much about Juliette's fight to be stronger than she's ever been before.

i'm so excited to share her story with you.

thank you thank you thank you for all of your support throughout this journey. you guys have been incredible and you keep me sane.

happy friday, dear friends. i can't wait for you to share all of your book covers with me.

<3

SHATTER ME COVER REVEAL: ANNOUNCEMENT

2011-07-13T13:54:00.000-07:00

hey guys!! just wanted to give you a quick heads up:

tomorrow, July 14th, at 9am EST, we're doing the SHATTER ME cover reveal on MTV's Hollywood Crush.

STAY TUNED. :D :D

squeeeeeaaaak.

THAT IS ALL I HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THAT

2011-07-11T22:42:00.000-07:00

THE ONLY STORY YOU KNEW HOW TO TELL

2011-07-10T23:33:00.000-07:00

sometimes a book isn't a heartbreaking work of staggering genius.
sometimes it's the only story you knew how to tell.

and that's okay.

happy monday, my friends.
write on.

<3

IT'S SO NICE TO FINALLY MEET YOU

2011-07-08T02:10:00.000-07:00

there aren't many people who understand what it's like to be a writer.

how do you even explain it? how do you explain that words -- while incredibly practical -- are used by you as far more than a medium for delivering information and asking for a diet coke? how do you describe what it's like to look at a stranger and feel inspired to sketch them into a story? that you wake up in the morning and ideas are spilling into your hands, falling into your pockets, mixed into your morning cereal? that you listen to the wind, the rain, the roar of a thunderstorm not because you're wondering about the weather but because you're trying to find the perfect words to describe it?

writing -- as a whole -- is an incredibly solitary pursuit. and yet i find it fascinating that most of us still crave companionship, commiseration, someone with whom to share this journey. it helps to have someone to talk to -- someone who isn't straining for a smile while staring at the clock on the wall, wondering when we'll stop talking about our query letter long enough for them to catch the last 15 minutes of their favorite show. sometimes we need someone to tell us that we're going to be okay, that this climb up Mount Everest has been done before, that the rejection frostbitten into our extremities will heal and we will be whole again one day. sometimes, we just need a friend to hold our imaginary hand as we sob our inbox woes all over their e-shoulder.

and that's okay.

i know that most of you who read this blog are fully aware of the industry and your place in it. you have crit groups and beta readers and writer-friends and blogs and tooters and facebooks -- you're 200 steps ahead of the competition. but i also know that some of you who read this blog (and many other blogs, i'm sure) are silent lurkers, quiet friends who never comment, who never blog, who are wondering why i keep talking about a tooter when you're pretty sure you heard something about justin bieber calling it a twitter. you're silently soaking up information whenever you get a chance, reading on lunch breaks and during traffic jams and looking for help but perhaps to shy to reach out. maybe you're scared?

i ask this because i've been there.

when i first started learning about the industry, i was insanely overwhelmed by the enormity of it all. i even remember being amazed (and so impressed!) by the people who left comments on blog posts. they seemed so sure and confident! they made jokes and said witty things and oh how nice it would be, i thought, to one day comment on a blog post without freaking the hell out and, quite possibly, peeing my pants in the process. i remember reading agent and editor blogs and sneaking peeks at twitter feeds and being utterly astounded by the friendships and relationships i was sure i'd never be a part of. it seemed like everyone was friends with everyone and i didn't have a clue how to reach out and say hello without feeling like an idiot. until one day i decided to shrug a lot and take the first step. i set up a blog. i started talking to people. i tweeted on the twitter. and the people? they turned out to be some of the best i've ever met, internet or otherwise.

so if you have writer-friends and are already a part of this community? i hope you never leave. i hope you stay and build life-long relationships and benefit from the brilliance of having such a tight community of writers -- at every stage in this journey -- for as long as forever.

but if you don't? if you're still feeling shy, and maybe you're a little scared?
i hope you won't be.

this is me, officially introducing myself. my name is Tahereh and i write books. i've got lots of brothers. i live in southern california. i'm a big fan of pie. i almost never wear matching socks, but that's mostly because i'm no good at doing laundry.

what about you? i'd love it if you introduced yourself, too.
let's say hi to one another.

<3

LOOKING FOR PLOTS IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES

2011-07-06T11:49:00.000-07:00

Anonymous asked...
Do you have any suggestions about plot? How do you know when you have a plot? What do you do when you've finished a book, only to realize it is plot-less, besides, you know, banging your head against the desk and weeping as you finish all of the chocolate in your apartment?

plot is a tricky thing. but mostly it's tricky because you first have to understand what it is. everyone talks about plot like it's this Thing that all books must have lest you be cast off into the desert of broken tricycles and removed appendixes and used bandaids. (and it's true -- plot is crucial; without it, you have no real story.) but what is plot? what is it really? for me, the first step in overcoming an obstacle has always been to understand it in its entirety -- because only once you truly understand the mechanics of an issue can you deconstruct it piece by piece.

let's start with the dictionary.

noun

a secret plan or scheme to accomplish some purpose,especially a hostile, unlawful, or evil purpose: a plot tooverthrow the government.

Also called storyline. the plan, scheme, or main story of aliterary or dramatic work, as a play, novel, or short story.

a small piece or area of ground: a garden plot; burial plot.

i think it's safe to say that the definition we're most concerned with is #2. "the plan, scheme, or main story of a literary or dramatic work."

in other words: what's the point of your book?

if you're telling a story about a girl and her friends in high school, it's not enough for her to simply go through the motions of getting up, going to class, taking tests and passing out at night. there has to be a bigger purpose. she's in high school, and sure, she'll go through the motions, but then there has to be some kind of inciting incident. something that shakes the foundation of everything that's been okay and normal for her. BAM, her parents die. BAM, she's abducted by aliens. BAM, her best friend is actually a were-lemur. right? something has to happen.

and then there has to be a point. there has to be a plot.

so this typical high school girl wakes up one typical tuesday morning to drink her typical glass of OJ and is driving her typical sedan to school expecting another typical day like all the rest when OMG OMG OMG ENTER INCITING INCIDENT. something pivotal happens. she crashes into an alien spaceship. she hits a tree and dies and becomes a ghost. she's running late for class and realizes she can make all the traffic lights turn green with nothing but her mind.

BAM.

that's when the protag is catapulted into some kind of Mission that she hopes to accomplish by the end of the book. sometimes that Mission is saving the world. sometimes it's about discovering how to put the pieces of her life back together after losing a loved one. sometimes it's a fun story about scheming to win the boy of her dreams and sometimes it a sad story about starcrossed lovers who have to fight to be together. there are a million trillion zillion ways to develop a plot.

but you have to have a point.
every story has to have a purpose.

you should be able to ask yourself What does my main character want? and What is he/she trying to accomplish? and How is he/she going to accomplish this goal? and then be able to answer all of these questions in one or two sentences. if you can do that, you're okay. you're on the right track. otherwise you're going to have to dig a little deeper to discover what story it is, exactly, that you're trying to tell.

HOW DO YOU WORK?

2011-07-05T11:16:00.000-07:00

HAPPY DAY-AFTER-4TH-OF-JULY, GUYS!

did you have a good holiday? i ran a 5k yesterday and now my body is very pissed off and mildly offended and currently we are not speaking to each other. it makes movement very difficult. i say "RIGHT LEG FORWARD!" and my body says "you can go to hell you masochistic wildebeest" and we go on like that for a while.

ANYWHO! i have been thinking about things, things like working and writing and mulling over ideas and etc etc, and i was wondering:

how do you work?

i'm the kind of person who needs absolute, absolute, absolute silence when i write. i can't work in coffee shops or other public places. i don't even work well with another person in the room. i like to be holed up in a corner with nothing but my keyboard and my imagination. (and pots and pots of tea.) i get very little done otherwise.

but what about you? we all work so differently, and the beauty of this business is that there's no wrong way to do it. so i'm curious.

where and how do you get your best work done?

curious, my friends.

curious.

HEARTS

SHATTER ME ARC WINNERS 2.0

2011-07-01T09:54:00.000-07:00

OKAY GUYS.

thank you so much for being patient with me. i had to calculate the 360+ entries and it involved maths and numbers and calculators and counting on more than 10 fingers and LET ME TELL YOU. it was quite an ordeal. the maths become very difficult for me when i run out of fingers.

SO.

thank you all so, so, so so much for all of your enthusiasm in entering this contest. i can't even tell you how much it means to me. and, as always, i really, truly wish i could give an ARC to each and every one of you, but... alas, i cannot. BUT! i will be getting a second set of ARCs (with cover art!) so not to worry. there will be more ARC contests in our future. promises.

now.
without further ado... our two winners are:

TayLyee

and

Brodie

CONGRATULATIONS, GUYS! :D :D
if you would please email me your mailing addresses at
thmafi at gmail dot com, i'll send those right out!

thank you all for entering! and again, don't worry!
SO MANY MORE EXCITING THINGS TO COME.

really.

july is going to be spectacular.

also here is a baby sloth:

6 THINGS I'VE LEARNED ABOUT PUBLISHING

2011-06-28T13:42:00.000-07:00

1. it's a business. i know people say this all the time? i know we throw this sentence around like it's so obvious that it's almost ridiculous to keep repeating it? but it's really, really, really true. even though we write books with all the parts of our hearts and souls, the moment we turn around and try to sell our work, everything changes. it's good, i think, to stay grounded and mindful of the fact that feelings are only one part of this industry -- and it's not a bad thing! but it helps to remember, if only to put our journey in perspective. because at the end of the day, these feelings need to sell.

2. it's a slow business. but you guys already know this, right? of course you do. hell, if you look up 'Publishing' in the dictionary it says MAYBE YOU SHOULD JUST GO AHEAD AND READ THE REST OF THIS DICTIONARY BECAUSE IT'S GOING TO BE A WHILE, KID.

3. so much of this slow business is about keeping secrets. you'll learn a bit of news today about something amazing and won't be able to say anything for the next 2 months. 3 months. 6 weeks. 5 days. who knows? the point is, you learn to keep your lips zipped and pretty soon you're annoying the hell out of everyone because people want answers and all you can give them are cryptic lolcats and pictures like this:

YOU'LL HAVE YOUR ANSWERS SOON, MY PRETTY

4. there are no guarantees. about anything. even the things that you think are guaranteed are not guaranteed. so it's best to just relax and enjoy the ride. there are so many people and things and jobs and issues and surprises and secrets and processes that it is absolutely impossible for 99% of anything to be within your control. you have to make peace with yourself early on that you cannot control anything, and you shouldn't hope to, either. hope for the best, plan to be patient, and most everything will delight you. (for everything else, there's chocolate.)

5. you will eat a lot of chocolate. this much should be obvious.

6. publishing is a business (a slow business! see #2) comprised entirely of people. i know. crazy weird to imagine, right? but it's true. it's basically a huge group of super nice people with families and kids and commutes and leaky ceilings and ex-spouses they'd like to punch in the nose. really. one day you will sell your brilliant novel and you will fly to new york to meet your editor and you will be absolutely astonished by how very HUMAN your editor is. it will astound and amaze you. you will spend the length of your lunch/dinner/coffee meeting just staring at your editor in awe, eyes wide with wonder and fingers entirely too tempted to reach out and pinch the person who paid money for your book. and then, my friend, you will fly home in a daze, delighted by the idea that Publishing is just a mite less scary than it seemed when you first met its marble exterior. because tucked behind those fancy doors are little cubicles stacked high with books and the people who love them.

<3

THE INTERNET KEEPS ME YOUNG

2011-06-26T23:23:00.000-07:00

these... are some of the recent google searches that have led to my blog. i've been lolling all weekend.

HAPPY MONDAY, DEAREST FRIENDS.

NOMS

2011-06-24T09:04:00.000-07:00

i had this blog post all ready and everything, but then i was like HEY IT'S FRIDAY i think it's definitely time for a funny cute animal video.

so this is what you're getting.

HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE!

<3

SHATTER ME ARC CONTEST 2.0

2011-06-21T00:13:00.000-07:00

i promised you we'd have another contest, didn't i?
and i would never lie to you, would i?

SO! here we are!

i'd contemplated doing this contest a little later, because we're supposed to get the second set of Advance Reader Copies (with cover art!) relatively soonishishish, and i thought you might like to wait and get an ARC with cover art. but then i asked twitter what they thought about this idea of mine and they pretty unanimously agreed that i should just have two contests. i guess i'm easily convinced.

THO LET'S BE HONEST MY HEART IS A MARSHMALLOW FOR YOU GUYS

see? no cover art yet :(

also! just a quick side note: so many of you have been asking me about SHATTER ME cover art and when, if ever, we will get to see it. and i'm so sorry for the wait, but there are things and hoops and steps and surprises and SECRET SECRETS and basically i have no control over it. but suffice it to say that i am VERY VERY VERY excited to share it with you. and hopefully this will happen soon. soonish. soonishish. and when it does, you will know. this i can promise you, because harper has things and stuff and THINGS planned for this occasion. you will know. promises.

ahem.
hehe.

YOU GUYS KNOW THE DRILL, RIGHT? this is simple. it's always simple.

if you want an ARC, just leave a comment saying you want one!
and random.org will choose TWO winners.

easy, right?

promotion, as always, is not necessary! but if you do tweet or blog or myface or spacebook or tumblr or grab a tube of lipstick and write it on your forehead, please let me know in the comments.

+1 for every time you link to this contest on your twitter, facebook, etc. (up to 5 extra entries!)
+2 if you link to this post on your blog.
(please leave links so i can find them)

THAT'S IT! them's the rules.

THIS CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED

~~contest is~~ ~~INTERNATIONAL~~~~, and closes~~ ~~NEXT SUNDAY, June 26th, 2011, 11:59 P.M. PST.~~

MMMM HMMMMMMMMM

happiest happy day, dear friends!

<3333

p.s. here's the teaser trailer, just as a bit of a refresher. :D

4 THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER STOP DOING

2011-06-20T11:51:00.000-07:00

no matter what stage you're at in this process, there are always things you should be doing.
here are four:

1. READ BLOGS

blogs are the gold mine of the internet. i learned about 100% of what i know about publishing from the internet. (danger danger: you must, of course, be wary of what you read! find blogs that are known and respected -- blogs that win awards for content and are generally agreed upon as the best publishing blogs in the industry -- i'm talking about Nathan Bransford, Janet Reid, Rachelle Gardner, Miss Snark, Pimp My Novel, Guide to Literary Agents, GalleyCat, Writer Beware, Alan Rinzler, and 101 MORE of some of the best sites on the web.) i read blogs before i had a clue, i read them while i was still figuring things out, and i read them now, every day, every single day, long after i started this process. good blogs will keep you on your toes and apprised of current events, changes in the economic climate, breaking news with regard to bookstores, authors, agents and editors. if you want to know the world you're working in, you have to keep yourself informed. all the time.

2. READ NEW RELEASES

not just books. not just any books. but the new releases in your genre. you have to know what's selling, what's working, what's doing well in the market. read everything! but don't forget to read lots of new releases, too. they'll give you a good idea of how trends are working and what readers are responding to. it's also interesting to study publicity, marketing, to see how much the industry has shifted in these new-fangled electronic days and how much social media is making a difference in how we connect with readers. things are changing, books are changing; new releases will give you a... newer perspective into what's happening on the shelves.

3. CONNECT WITH ASPIRING WRITERS

as you progress in this industry, you'll tend to meet and connect with other writers who've, more or less, achieved the same sort milestones you have. and this is good. it's always good. but i think it's also very important to never lose touch with those who are still new to the journey, still plugging along, still drafting, editing, preparing to query, or sitting tight in the query trenches, helmets strapped to their heads as shrapnel falls from the sky. don't lose sight of where you came from and how long this journey was, is, will continue to be. there are so many talented writers (agented or unagented, published or unpublished) that we can learn from and build relationships with. don't burn any bridges. don't isolate yourself from others just because you've managed to climb another rung on this ladder. we're all here to support each other and we can't afford to lose that.

4. GET OUT OF THE HOUSE

no, seriously. being a writer makes it too easy to get caught up in an endless cycle of writing, reading, editing, reading, editing, reading, writing, tooting, myfacing, spacebooking and emailing. get out of your house. say hello to someone who doesn't live inside of your computer. exercise your eyes in front of natural light. go buy a carton of milk. trip on the sidewalk and blush in front of a friendly stranger or two. go to a coffee shop and hold up the line by asking for a tall half-skinny half-1 percent extra hot split quad shot (two shots decaf, two shots regular) latte with whip. and then smile a lot. twitch a little. wonder if these pants are too tight, too loose, too long on you now, because honestly, you can't remember the last time you wore actual pants made from anything but stretchy cotton. try to make time for the fun things, for social events, for long walks on the beach. it's good to feel an actual breeze every once in a while. really. at least this is what i've heard. i wouldn't know.

i'm clearly still sitting inside of my house.

<3

SHOOTING A STAR STRAIGHT THROUGH THE HEART

2011-06-15T00:28:00.000-07:00

Anonymous asked...
I have completed my first novel and now I am on the search for an agent. I've been navigating the pages of AW and AAR so I've learned a lot but I was hoping that I could just get some, general, advice. I'm querying far and wide, but deep down inside, I am hoping that I land with Writers House. I've been interested in them for a while along with Prospect Agency. Being that I am a newbie I just wanted to know if the light at the end of the tunnel is actually a thing to shoot for or am I shooting too high?

being a newbie does not mean you don't deserve the best. it doesn't mean that you can't aim for the highest, the brightest, the gold star. in fact, it means nothing at all. your job as an aspiring writer is to write the best manuscript you can, to do the best research you're capable of, and to compose the most compelling query letter possible. but sometimes we have to get out of our own way -- we have to step back before we sabotage ourselves.

i know a lot of you are new to this blog. many of you learned about my book and my twitter and my caffeine-addiction only within the past few months. (hello! welcome! you look mighty fetching today!) and as a result, there are many of you who aren't familiar with my entire publishing process. i won't bore you with all the details, but i do want to clarify a few things that have come up more than once: i am by no stretch of the imagination some kind of overnight success.

i know. right? it feels funny even typing that. but i've had people say this to me, and it made me almost jump out of my own skin in surprise. it's so flattering! but my oh my, not true at all.

i wrote 5 manuscripts before i wrote SHATTER ME. and they didn't work out. i had an agent before i signed with Jodi, and that didn't work out either. my work was going in a different direction and i had to make a decision about my career. i had to seriously sit and think about where i thought my career was headed vs. where i wanted it to go. it was excruciating. it was terrifying. really, truly, terrifying. i basically walked away from a sure thing with nothing but a hope and a prayer and a manuscript my gut was telling me was the strongest thing i'd ever written. and though none of this is a secret, i rarely talk about it, but that's only to respect the privacy of all parties involved. and i'm only mentioning it now because i want you to know that this journey is hard. it's grueling. and at every level we're brand new and have no clue what the hell is going on. i'm a newbie every day. every single day i'm learning new things about this industry even though i read just about everything i can get my hands on. it's endless. it's enormous.

it can be daunting.

but you have to trust yourself. believe in yourself. believe that you are capable of greatness and don't be afraid to go after it.

i say this all the time, but it never stops being true: the trick is in never giving up. the test is in the all day every day every single day struggle. the further you go, the harder it gets. the rejections never stop. the ache and worry sometimes seems to double. but your accomplishments are paramount. they will overshadow everything else. the joy and beauty and wonder of being a part of such an incredible journey makes it all worth it.

my point is this: you can't be scared now. not now. if you're already doubting your worth in simply seeking a literary agent, you're selling yourself too short, too soon. you have to be your biggest cheerleader. you have to look in the mirror every day and know, without a doubt, that you are incredible. that you can take letters and string them together to spin tales of glory and gore and chaos and love. disaster. hope. beauty and passion.

this is who you are. it's who we are. it's what we do. we craft characters from spindly sentences and take months, years, millions of hours to carve the perfect smile onto an imaginary face. we lose sleep and stay awake long after the world is tucked into bed just to place a beating heart into a body formed entirely by the movement of our fingers on a keyboard. we breathe life into worlds no one has ever visited. we imagine more, so much more, always more. we believe in the impossible.

you, my friend, are an inventor. a pioneer. a champion of the written word.

you deserve the best of everything.

and i hope you know that.

THE 5 SIGNS THAT SAY YOU MUST BE QUERYING

2011-06-13T09:07:00.000-07:00

1. you are a complete emotional train wreck.

your mood swings are insane. one moment you're all OH BOY OH BOY I AM SO PUMPED YOU GUYS THIS IS GOING TO BE SUPER SWELL and the next you're rereading your query letter and your manuscript and you discover 17 typos on page 22 and you're ready to start bawling your eyes out because YOU'VE READ THIS MANUSCRIPT ELEVENTY-BILLION TIMES and how is it even POSSIBLE that you didn't see these things until you SENT IT OFF and then you're sitting there, hiccuping sobs and sniffling snotbubbles when for no reason but the sheer manic state of your brain do you suddenly switch off and feel a strange hope that maybe things will work out, that maybe this agent will be The One, the one who loves you and gets you and sends you special messages on twitter and then OHHHHHH YOU'RE GOING TO VOMIT EVERYWHERE and maybe, you know what? you don't even know, you're crying again, and maybe now you've thrown a few sharp objects across the room and you're hit with SUDDEN BRILLIANCE. you have the perfect solution. you're going to be PRODUCTIVE. you're going to spend your every waking hour doing "research" to help assuage your ailing heart.

yes. that's right.

2. you develop stalker-like tendencies.

you start reading agent blogs, twitter feeds, every interview they've ever given on the internet, hoping for some kind of magical insight into the possible outcome of your situation. you're searching for a sign, a signal that they're secretly in love with you (or will soon be secretly in love with you!) and your manuscript. you're hoping for a glimpse into their thoughts, their feeeeeelings, their reactions to what they're receiving in their slushpile. do they seem happy today? do they sound excited about something? all of a sudden you're all omg omg maybe it's because they're in love with my manuscript OR WAIT. MAYBE IT'S BECAUSE THEY'RE IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE'S MANUSCRIPT AND THEY HATE MINE SO MUCH THEY WISH I WOULD JUST FALL OFF A CLIFF AND OMG THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING WHY DID I EVER EVEN GET OUT OF BED 5 DAYS AGO SOMEONE PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JUST SHOOT ME IN THE FACE

3. you exhibit an almost Pavlovian response to the pinging chime of your inbox.

this is pretty self-explanatory. but suffice it to say that the moment you hear that sound, you will exhibit a multitude of emotions, including, but not limited to:

- nausea

- vomiting

- sweating

- crying

- anger

- anxiety

- shaking

- twitching

- insomnia

- loss of dignity

4. people will stop liking you.

all you care about, all you want to talk about, all you even want to think about is your inbox. if you own a smartphone, you are constantly checking your emails. at work. at home. in the middle of dinner. every 3 minutes. every 2 minutes. hell, who are you kidding, every 60 seconds. did you used to have a family? maybe you had a couple of kids? yeah? whatever happened to them? refresh refresh refresh HEY SO I READ THIS THING ON THE TWEETER ABOUT SHE SAID THAT THE THING AND THE YEAH AND YOU KNOW I REALLY THINK will be just about the only words you're capable of stringing together coherently. your ACQUAINTANCES will like you just fine -- you'll put on a smiling face for THEM, and when they ask you how you're doing, you'll cry only just a LITTLE bit -- but it's your truest friends and family who will not be able to stand the sight of you. every day it's, Oh, hey! How are you doing, Janie? and you're already pacing up and down the living room waving your arms like a crazy person, wringing your hands and WHAT IS THIS CHILD AND WHY IS IT CLINGING TO ME HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT MY QUERY LETTER YET

5. you want to give up.

you want to make the agony disappear, you want to make the pain stop, you want to back away slowly and take what little is left of your dignity and retire in Bermuda but wait, you were really hoping to cash in on that book thing because without the book thing all you can afford is a rickety adirondack chair at the ledge of your local community pool but the point is YOU'RE REALLY SICK AND TIRED OF THIS and you can't even REMEMBER the last time you had a nap, or slept through the night, and OH MY GOD HAS ANYONE BEEN FEEDING THE KIDS BECAUSE YOU CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER

it gets scary.

it gets scary as hell.

but know this: we've all had the crazies. all of us. and it's just a part of the process.

you, my friend, will be just fine.

HANG IN THERE.

never give up.

WELCOME TO OUR WORLD

2011-06-10T09:56:00.000-07:00

when you’re forced to attend some kind of social event when all you really

want is to be at home with a book.*

*this is a repost from my tumblr.

A QUICK ANNOUNCEMENT

2011-06-09T09:15:00.000-07:00

so, remember how i said june was going to be an exciting month?

well, here is the first piece of fun news:

i'm going to be on a YA panel at the San Diego Comic Con International :D :D

me, Kiersten White, Amanda Hocking, Stephanie Perkins, Andrea Cremer & Laini Taylor will be on the panel, and the super-awesome Nathan Bransford will be moderating. the official schedule, however, is not up yet, so we don't have clearance to talk about specific times. but we will be there. July 21-24 :D

SOOOOO

i am just saying maybe you should come you should definitely come

ALSO COSTUMES! apparently people wear costumes. i have no clue. i've never been to Comic Con before. so i'm kind of excited about this. maybe i'll wear a cape. maybe i'll convince jodi to wear a cape.

idk idk the possibilities are endless.

BUT I HOPE YOU CAN COME! that would be excellent.

are any of you going this year?

i am the picture of excitement:

ON BEING TOO SCARED TO SHARE A WORD

2011-06-08T00:55:00.000-07:00

Anonymous asked...
Do you ever get scared? Especially now that your ARCs are out and people can read your book, does it scare you to know that people are reading what you wrote? What's that like? I think that's the part of publishing that scares me the most -- the part where people you don't know actually read what you wrote. I don't know if I could ever handle that. How do you deal with it?

there's a shift in every stage of this journey. the shift from being an aspiring author, to even being an agented author, to then becoming an author with a book deal, and then finally crossing that threshold into the public where you stand, stark naked, waiting for people to tell you exactly what they think of your every imperfection as you huddle under the unflattering light of fluorescent bulbs. each stage is different, each unique in its own right. but that final stage? that last stage?

yeah, it can be pretty damn scary.

for so long we sit in silence behind a computer screen with nothing more than a blinking cursor and a shedding cat to keep us company. we pour our hearts out onto pages and wipe the tears from our eyes and maybe no one will ever know why we wrote what we did. maybe no one will ever truly understand what propelled us to write what we wrote in those hundreds of pages.

not everyone can know our stories, our backstories, our inspirations and aspirations. not everyone will look long enough to see the years of rejection, the pain and perseverance that went into writing and publishing a novel. reviewers will be honest, and in doing so, they might be cruel. they might try to draw parallels from our work to our waking life -- which makes sense, considering what an emotionally involved endeavor it is to write a book -- but often the conclusions they draw will be incorrect. there's nothing we can do to control that.

so we sit. and we wait. we eat our fingers and rock back and forth and wish we could dig up the floorboards and bury ourselves underneath. some days will be hard. some readers will hate the words that dared to stumble out from under our fingertips. maybe we'll be judged. maybe we'll be accused. maybe we'll be laughed at and ridiculed.

but i think that's okay.

because here's the thing about writing a book. here's the thing about writing with heart, with hurt, with emotion and raw, organic feeling: someone will find it. someone will find your words, your strength, your humor and your sensitivity and it will be an escape, a wonder, a welcome friend. for every critical review there will be a constructive one, for every constructive review there will be others that are praising. i believe that.

and it's hard. it's hard because maybe sometimes we'll want to hide. sometimes we'll wish we never cut ourselves open and threw our hearts on the table and maybe sometimes we'll want to quit. we'll be blamed for covers and copyeditors and things that are entirely outside of our control. but the trick is in remembering why we ever put pen to paper, fingers to keyboard, eyes to the sky. we had words in our head that we needed to share. we had stories to tell that couldn't be confined by the limitations of our human body.

we needed to write.
and in doing so we will have reached out.

it's hard to be thrown into a world of scrutiny, a world wherein your rawest emotions are ripped out of your chest and are promptly evaluated by people who may or may not like what they see. of course it's hard. but it's part of the beauty. it's part of the struggle. because there's something so profound in realizing the utter subjectivity of this industry. this brilliance unique to the world of literature. that a book that makes one girl roll her eyes is the same that makes another sob herself to sleep.

you can never forget why you write. why you dare to dream and dream big.

it's scary sometimes, maybe a lot of the times, but you don't have to be afraid. because you and me, anon? you and me and everyone else -- we're all in this together. we're all going to face the same challenges, the same hurdles, the same stumbling blocks. but it will make us stronger. it will make us braver. maybe the negative reviews will push us to write better. maybe the positive reviews will make our days much brighter. maybe it'll all be worth it just to get an email from someone you've never met -- someone you might never meet -- who read and loved your book.

and when you feel scared, take a look around. remember that every single book you've ever seen in your entire life was written by someone just like you and me. and they were all scared, too. they worried. they wondered. they struggled with fear and self-doubt. they were criticized and ridiculed and ripped to pieces.

but without them, where would we be?

<3

THINGS AND THINGS AND ETC

2011-06-06T08:07:00.000-07:00

GOOD MONDAY, MY FRIENDS!

it's been too long, i think, since there was a decent post up on this blog, and i want to apologize for that. post-BEA was a little crazy, and then book 2 was officially due, and then i think my brain was just tired and a little bit broken. but! i am back! and it is JUNE! and june means all manner of things! seriously.

stay tuned for exciting things to happen in june.

but first!

1. this is WAY overdue, and forgive me for the delay, but the winners of JACOB WONDERBAR AND THE COSMIC SPACE KAPOW are Melody, Heidi, and Ishta Mercurio! congratulations, ladies! if you would please email me your mailing addresses at thmafi at gmail dot com, i will gladly send those wonderful books posthaste.

2. i'm sure you guys have heard all about the Wall Street Journal article about YA, yes? of course you have. and from this article has grown many things, including an entire deciduous forest of feelings and emotions and important reactions. all of it has been said. all has been said well, and from every angle. but all i really want to say is that i'm so proud of the YA community. so wowed and humbled. and i think the most awe-inspiring thing to come of this entire event was the #YAsaves hashtag. i would highly recommend taking a look through these tweets if you haven't already -- they really touched my heart.

3. i have to go in for jury duty this month. *stares at things* *pokes internet* *sighs a little*

4. someone, 2 weeks ago, re: one of my failed blogging attempts on my iPad, said that i'd saved them a lot of money by pointing out that i couldn't, well, blog on my iPad. and i wanted to address this, very quickly, just to say this: the iPad is incredible. i don't regret buying it or using it or traveling with it, ever ever. it is not the replacement for a laptop though, and this is something that i think might confuse people. the iPad is, in my opinion, an insanely tricked out e-reader. and for this it is nothing short of perfect. so if you need a laptop? if you don't own a laptop? an iPad is not a substitute. not even close. but if you need an easy travel companion with access to internet, emails, important applications and thousands of books at your fingertips? it is your best friend. (also i still have no idea if there's a proper way to blog on my iPad. it could be that i'm just doing it wrong.)

5. EMAILS! i have so many of these that i still haven't answered. forgive me. i promise i will be with you shortly. and for all of you who might be book bloggers, etc, and are interested in receiving an ARC of SHATTER ME for review, you can skip straight through me and go directly to my publicist. she has all the information. if you're interested, her name is Allison Verost, and you can find her at Allison.Verost at harpercollins dot com.

SPEAKING OF WHICH

6. i'm thinking it's time for another SHATTER ME ARC contest. what do you think?

happy hearts, everyone!

i hope you've all been doing well :D

SORRY GUYS

2011-05-31T21:26:00.000-07:00

the first draft of book 2 is due tomorrow and i've been busy chasing down my muse in an attempt to polish the sucker before i send it off.

PROMISES I WILL BE WITH YOU SHORTLY

i have not forgotten you. how could i forget you?

THIS IS US:

BEA! NYC! THESE ARE A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS.

2011-05-26T11:12:00.000-07:00

OMG I'M FINALLY BACK HOME! with an actual computer!

as demonstrated in my two previous posts, i was having a difficult time using my iPad to post on blogger, and, as a result, all of my posts were weird and devoid of formatting and little more than really pathetically hideous blocks of text. BUT NOW I'M BACK! and all is well again in the world of aesthetically-pleasing posts.

BEA! updates!

BEA was insane. i mean. huge. and noisy. and there were SO MANY BOOKS IT WAS INCREDIBLE. also there were people lugging suitcases around for all their ARCs and swag and i was... astounded (she said, not unkindly). more than anything else, it was truly awe-inspiring to see so many people come together to share a love of all things literature.

here are some things that happened:

harper set up this photo shoot for my face. also the rest of my body had to be there, too, so. anyway, bright and early monday morning, me, tara (my editor), jodi (my agent), and alison (art director) headed over to central park, where we met matt furman (photographer) and scott (his assistant). matt then proceeded to spend the next 2(ish) hours taking no fewer than eleventy-billion pictures of me trying to smile into the camera. it was probably the most fun i never expected to have at a photo shoot. the tourists kept taking pictures of matt taking pictures of me like i was some kind of exhibition on their tour of the park, and we ended the whole thing on a carousel ride, where i attempted to look awesome on the back of a plastic horse. i am just saying, it was nothing short of epic. hopefully i will be able to share these pictures with you soon.
i got to meet everyone at harper. and all i'm going to say about this is that every time i think about this particular event i get a little weepy. calling them wonderful would be the understatement of the internet. amazing, amazing, amazing. amazing.
i went speed-dating! well, no i was not actually speed-dating. that is to say, i was not looking for love and long walks at the beach at BEA. i actually got to do this awesome thing where, for 3 minutes at a time, i sat with 19 tables (8-10 people per table), and pitched my book. it was spectacular. i love librarians and booksellers almost as much as i love butter pecan ice cream. and let's be honest, that's a hell of a lot of love.
I SIGNED BOOKS. you guys, i realized -- albeit, a little belatedly -- that i needed an author signature just about 2 minutes before my signing. not a good time for realizations, i have to say. but let's tell a story about my signing, shall we? YES I THINK WE SHOULD. here i was, sitting in the green room with tara, feeling relatively calm about the entire thing, hoping that maybe a couple of people would show. no pressure, i said to myself! it's the first time you've ever done a signing, tahereh! no need to be disappointed if no one shows up! ohhhhh so i sat there, patting my self-esteem on the back, feeding my brain mental cookies and making myself promises i didn't intend to keep when jodi walks into the green room -- without even saying hello, i might add -- drops her bag on the floor and says HAVE YOU SEEN YOUR LINE? and. well. yes. this is where i promptly started having a heart attack. i don't even really remember much of what happened after that. all i know is that my hands started shaking so hard i couldn't even hold a pen straight and i had to keep apologizing for my handwriting (which, i SWEAR, does not normally resemble that of a 5-year-old's).
WE RAN OUT OF BOOKS. it was unbelievable. someone just told me today that the line was so long they had to cut it off 7 minutes after i started signing. they'd allocated only a specific number of books for the signing, and the rest were set up at the harper booth for a giveaway a bit later in the day, and, unfortunately, we had to turn people away. i also heard there were a lot of people cutting in line (FOR SHAME!). but this is a strange place for me to be on the feelings train. i want to apologize to all of you who weren't able to get a book (and who were cut off either by my publicist or a line-jumper), but i am also so unbelievably FLOORED that you came out at all that i am just beyond words deliriously happy. i don't even know how to tell you how much it means to me that you took the time out to stop by, to say hello, to tell me you read my blog, to take a picture of my shoes and tell me you follow me on twitter. but thank you. a million times, thank you.

there were so many other things i could tell you stories about, but i do not wish to stuff you with so many words that it spoils your appetite. i will only leave you with this, in case you never get to see it:

a picture taken from the acknowledgements section of my ARC

p.s. so many people got to see me at BEA, and so many of you have asked me to share a picture of myself that i feel it's only fair for me to indulge this now. but i'm going to tell you a very big secret, my friends: my picture has been all over the internet for like, 3 months now. all you had to do was google my name. but i never said anything because i really don't like pictures. and pictures, truly, truly hate me. though i suppose now i need to get over it. i don't know. in any case! here is a tahereh-sanctioned photo. and as soon as i get pictures from my harper shoot i will share them with you!

SO MANY HEARTS

SHATTER ME TEASER TRAILER

2011-05-23T17:32:00.000-07:00

HEYYYY GUYSSS!!i'm... having trouble with this whole blog posting thing again, so i'm going to keep this short. i would've posted this tomorrow, during the day, at a more decent hour, but, alas, i'm not going to be near a computer tomorrow. so!HERE IS THE SURPRISE: http://youtu.be/UHApCwLkVU0i have no clue how to embed on my ipad. so, uh. you know. there it is. without any fancy flourishes. maybe pretend there are fancy flourishes. that might help.SO MANY HEARTS

RISE AND SHINE

2011-05-22T19:30:00.000-07:00

HI FRIENDS!!i have pretty much just arrived in NYC and i've brought nothing but my ipad so my online everything is kind of limited. in fact, i just accidentally published this post (the incomplete version) exactly 5 times already. the sad part is i don't even know which button it was that i accidentally pressed. so.. here's hoping it won't happen again.two things:1. i still haven't announced the WONDERBAR winners! which i need to do. hopefully i can figure out a way to sort through the winners through my ipad.. but, again, i'm kind of struggling with this blogger platform right now. i just accidentally published this post again. whoops.2. I HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU. oh god i just published this damn thing again i don't even. sorry. that's not the surprise. the surprise will be shared SHORTLY! either today or tomorrow. so look out for that. i will keep you posted.otherwise, however, i will be a bit scarce these next couple of days.BUT I WILL BE IN TOUCH.promises.by the way -- you guys want anything while i'm in the city?hehe.HEARTSALSO: blogger isn't allowing me to create a post in the rich text editor. so this is posting completely devoid of any html. as a result, it looks like i have no idea how to use the return key. i am so sorry for this extraordinarily hideous paragraph of text.

RING BELL TWICE FOR SERVICE

2011-05-16T00:57:00.000-07:00

GOOD MONDAY, EVERYONE!

i have a few updates to share with you. i hope that is okay.

1. FIRST YOU SEE ME NOW YOU DON'T! i will be a bit scarce this week. i'm diving back into book 2 to polish and plump it up a bit, so i'll be focusing most of my energy in the direction of my manuscript. as a result, my blog posts might be skimpy, or, you know, i don't know, maybe they'll be really good? maybe i'll be blogging more in an effort to procrastinate or i don't know i don't know it's too soon to tell. if, however, all goes according to plan and i manage to stay focused, i will very probably be writing skimpy blog posts. we shall see!

2. CONTEST! STILL OPEN! blogger decided to let its freak flag fly last week and, in the process of discovering itself, totally threw the rest of us under the bus. blogger was basically broken on Thursday and Friday, and even though now it's back up and functioning, it caused us a lot of problems. we also lost all of our comments on recent posts. SO! i'm keeping the contest for a copy of Jacob Wonderbar and the Cosmic Space Kapow open for another day. RUN ALONG AND ENTER! you won't regret it.

3. WIN AN ARC OF SHATTER ME & A 10 PG CRIT! mm hmmm. so. the amazing ladies over at Help Write Now are running an auction to benefit southern storm relief. andddd... even though this auction went up last Thursday, blogger attacked it and killed it and ate all the comments. so if you bid last Thursday and you're still interested -- feel free to bid again! and if you didn't bid last Thursday and maybe you want to bid now? feel free to bid! all proceeds go to charity, and the auction for the ARC & crit will be open until this Wednesday, May 18.

4. I'LL BE GONE NEXT WEEK. i'm leaving for BEA soon, and i won't be back until the end of next week. so... i don't know how my blogging will be, but i will try to at least post funny pictures or something. this is more of a heads up for anyone who emails me or is waiting to hear back from me on anything. i've got a stack of questions from readers to answer on the blog but, seeing as how i can't really answer more than one question at a time, it might take a little while. but i will be in touch! AND MAYBE AFTER BEA WE'LL HAVE ANOTHER ARC CONTEST?? i don't know! the possibilities! they are endless!

5. THE COVER. remember how i said that the ARC with the cover art for SHATTER ME would be at BEA? welllllll... not so, my friends. not so. not anymore. the cover is all super-sekrit-agent-man and is still underway, so it won't be revealed until after BEA. but! i can tell you this: i have seen some early cover concept stuff and.... i am so excited i don't even know how to put it in capital letters. seriously. i'm so excited that i'm now in a state of shock and my fingers can't reach the caps lock key. i will definitely definitely keep you posted. i can't wait to share.

6. SOMETHING EXCITING I CAN SHARE with you the week of BEA. yes. it is coming. you will see it. that is all i can say for now.

7. MMMMMM COFFEE. what. this is relevant.

THAT'S PRETTY MUCH IT.
i think.

---

now you tell me: what's one thing you wish you could say to your 16-year-old self?

HEARTS

NATHAN BRANSFORD BREAKS THE UNIVERSE

2011-05-16T00:38:00.000-07:00

today is a big day, guys.

amazing friend and super-blogger-extraordinaire Nathan Bransford is here to talk a bit about JACOB WONDERBAR AND THE COSMIC SPACE KAPOW, his debut middle grade novel hitting the shelves today. TODAY! THE DAY HAS FINALLY COME OMG

Jacob Wonderbar is used to detentions, but when a spaceship crashes near his house, he finds himself in a whole new level of trouble. After swapping a corn dog for the ship, he and his two best friends, Sarah Daisy and Dexter, take off on a madcap adventure. They accidentally cause an epic explosion, get kidnapped by a space pirate, and are marooned on planets like Numonia and Paisley, where the air smells like burp breath and revenge-hungry substitute teachers rule. And that's only the beginning . . . It turns out that there's an entire colony of space humans, and Jacob's long-lost father just might be one of them.

The first book in debut author Nathan Bransford's hilarious space adventure series has dynamite friendships, peculiar planets, and nonstop action. You'll never look at the stars the same way!

i had the pleasure of diving into an ARC (Advance Reader Copy) of WONDERBAR, and suffice it to say that it's an incredible action-packed adventure you're going to love. Jacob is hilarious and my favorite kind of 12 year old -- the kind who knows how to have fun and pull a good prank (or 50). i'd blast off into space with him any day of the week, and i'm so, so excited to share the book with you.

that's right. we're going to have a WONDERBAR giveaway.

but first! AN INTERVIEW with our esteemed author!

1. How do we know you're really Nathan Bransford and not an ALIEN?

You don't. But then again, maybe you do. See, you don't know!
Or do you?

2. Summarize WONDERBAR in 6 words.

Whoa better make this count

KidsFindASpaceshipAndBlastOffIntoSpaceAndBreakTheUniverseIt'sFunISwearHahaFOUNDaLOOPHOLE!!!!

3. Your favorite thing about writing this book?

Definitely the part where it wrote itself. How anyone ever writes a novel without a novel-writing robot I'll never know.

4. What surprised you most about writing these characters?

It was really fun to see them grow up along the way and to get to know them more and more over the course of the novel. Or at least that's what the robot who wrote my novel told me. In his emotionless robo-voice.

5. Did you always want to write Middle Grade novels?

Nope! I didn't know I wanted to write Middle Grade until I started writing this one.

6. Jacob Wonderbar is challenged to a duel. His weapon of choice would be:

   a. Harry's wand
   b. Edward's bite
   c. Hulk SMASH
   d. Other

d. Other: Devastating prank that makes you question your will to live

7. If you could hang out with Jacob for a day, where would you take him?

Probably the principal's office. Either that or Planet Coasterland if he's been on his best behavior (unlikely).

8. Your favorite line from the book?

According to Praiseworthy, who recounted the history of Planet Archimedes in extensive detail, the planet had been of keen interest to scientists because it had some of the strangest cloud formations ever observed, its rivers ran in perfectly straight lines, and most importantly, its insects were both plentiful and ugly.

9. Fill in the blanks:

If Jacob could _find his dad out in space_ then he would _um... well he's not sure what he'd do but he might be mad or happy or both at the same time_.

10. Be honest. You secretly want to be a(n) _________.

resident of Paris, France

11. Something you really hope readers will take away from your novel?

Space travel is not for the faint of heart, people. Sure, you'll go to all these awesome planets and have adventures and meet talking spaceships, but it's serious business!!!

12. How do you think Jacob Wonderbar would deal with someone like Dudley Dursley?

He would commit a fantastic prank, frame Dudley for the crime, take all the credit for himself, and probably get his friend Dexter into trouble in the process.

13. You have to go on a secret mission to outer space and you can only take one person with you. Who would you take, and why?

   a. Jacob Wonderbar
   b. Heidi Montag
   c. Hermione Granger
   d. Jonathan Franzen
   e. Other

e. Other: Mick Cracken, space buccaneer and bandit extraordinaire. We'd have fun and would complete the secret mission as long as he didn't maroon me on a random planet first.

14. Where can we find you? Are you having a launch party? Making any appearances?

Why yes, I am! I am hosting a launch party at Books Inc. Opera Plaza, Friday night in San Francisco. You are invited! Everyone! Friends too! Strangers? Why not!

15. Parting words?

I hope you like WONDERBAR! And thanks so much to my illustrious host, whose novel is going to take the world by storm in November!

A BIG SUPER HUGE THANK YOU TO NATHAN!

OKAY OKAY GUYS. i know you want to read this book, right? OF COURSE YOU DO!

and i'm giving away 3 copies.

all you have to do is leave a comment on this post telling me you want a copy,

and random.org will choose 3 winners. that's it!

note: contest closes Monday, May 16, 2011 at 11:59 PST.

BLAST OFF INTO SPACE, GUYS.
you won't regret it.

ON FEELING INADEQUATE

2011-05-10T22:31:00.000-07:00

Anonymous asked...
When it comes to writing, do you ever struggle with *feeling* inadequate? You figure you aren't and you're told you aren't, but it's that tiny little thought in the back of your mind when you open the Word document. That one that makes you close down Word before you even write a sentence. Does it ever go away?

it's hard, sometimes, to be confident when we have so many reasons to doubt our abilities. maybe our parents, our friends, our coworkers or classmates make us feel inferior. maybe we screwed up big in the past and we've never been able to live it down. maybe we have the weight of the world on our shoulders and sometimes it seems like no one will ever understand the kind of pressure we're under to succeed, to strive, to make something of ourselves.

and all of that is... normal, believe it or not. because we all struggle. all of us. every day.

i often doubt myself while writing, asking myself is this okay? is it alright? is this too much? not enough? too far? confusing? offensive? strange? will anyone understand that? and many times i question my own work. i always, always think i have room to improve and i'm constantly trying to better myself and my writing. today my writing is so much better than it was 6 months ago, because the more you write, the more you'll learn about the craft, the process.

but feeling inadequate is a little different.

now, there's always the possibility that by 'inadequate' you simply meant you doubt your work sometimes, that maybe you have days where you think your writing is crap and you have days where maybe you want to throw your laptop out the window and wonder why you ever considered writing a book in the first place. if so, welcome, my friend, to the world of being a writer.

but if you meant that you really, truly feel inadequate? (enough that it keeps you from writing even a single sentence?) then i worry.

i'm going to tell you a secret, anon. i'm going to tell you a very big secret about life, about people, about human psychology and day-to-day interactions.

everything is in your head.

you can make yourself believe whatever you want to believe. how you perceive yourself and how other people perceive you is entirely within your realm of control. if you want others to think you're confident, you act confident. you speak with conviction, you walk down the street with your head up high and you hand out smiles like they're going out of style. people will immediately perceive you differently, because we absorb others with our eyes. emotion comes from motion. you sit up straight, you focus on people when they speak to you, you perfect your handshake and you don't walk into a business meeting with a stain on your suit. you're cool. calm. collected.

you have to do the same thing in your head.

if your mind is a jumble of self-loathing, self-deprecation and self-doubt, it's going to cripple you. it will keep you from trusting yourself and your limitless potential. you have to love yourself enough -- respect yourself enough -- to believe you're capable. that sense of inadequacy comes from another place, maybe from another person, maybe from a series of events, maybe as a consequence of a lost opportunity. whatever it is, i doubt it's isolated to just your writing. try to find the root cause of all of this.

remind yourself that you're incredible. know, unequivocally, that you have just as much right to succeed as anyone else and that you are one hell of a human being. because if you don't believe it, how can you expect someone else to?

being human is hard. it comes with a lot of FEELINGS and EMOTIONS and ISSUES we don't know how to deal with. we're scared and nervous and we worry so much you'd think we were getting paid to do it. everyone struggles. we all have bad days. we all fight our lesser selves to be better. but don't be afraid to take a risk. don't be afraid to dare yourself. to take a chance on yourself.

don't be afraid to try.

because you are not inadequate. not for this. not for anything.

and invite anyone who says otherwise to exit your life.

STEALING TIME TO MAKE A SCHEDULE

2011-05-09T10:49:00.000-07:00

emyshin asked...
if you don't mind me asking -- i think you've mentioned that you had a job while writing SHATTER ME: how did you find time to write so quickly, hold a job, and keep up with social networking (and generally being awesome) at the same time?

Holly asked...

Hi! I’m one of aspiring writers who wants to get her book done but doesn’t have enough time (I’m studying hard). I think I need to get on schedule but don’t know which one really works. Do you have your own writing schedule? Is it really possible to write a novel in a short period of time?

these are really excellent questions. i think they're questions every writer struggles with, because so many of us are working and/or going to school, and/or supporting a family and/or running after kids and trying to get dinner on the table, all while attempting to write a novel, research the industry, establish an online presence, and attempt to market our books. it's a lot to ask of anyone.

up until about a week ago, i was working full-time. day job + writing job + life and life and life and life. and i don't even have kids. i am in AWE of the mothers and the fathers who work full-time and parent full-time and still find time to write. it boggles my mind.

because here's the thing: it's hard as hell.

i'm not going to lie. i can't pretend i just waved my Writer Wand and made things happen, because it's not easy to do all of these things at the same time. it really isn't. that's why it makes me ache with frustration when people intimate that writers must have a lot of free time, and oh, how nice for them to be able to sit around and suck on a pencil while inspiration bubbles in their teacups. i have no idea what world they think we live in, but it's cruel and painfully unfair to assume that writers don't work hard. in fact, we're working almost every free minute we can find.

we read books because we have to know our genre, our industry. we have to know what sells, what's hot, what's hitting the shelves in a big way. we read because we're looking for an agent, an editor, a publisher. we scour the acknowledgments sections of books we love because we're doing research to find a good fit for our novels. we save money to go to conferences just for five minutes to meet with an agent or an editor or to hear a few words at a panel that might help us inch closer to our dreams. we write until it hurts, until it makes us cry, until we're hunched over our laptops banging our heads against the windows and telling ourselves it's useless, it'll never work, what were we thinking and when was the last time we brushed our teeth.

it's hard.

but it's not impossible. i know it's not because i see it every day. i see moms and dads and college kids and teenagers getting book deals and finding their fit in this industry and i know it's not impossible. but scheduling time to write isn't something i can teach anyone. it's something that has to come from you. you have to want to write -- you have to want it badly enough to prioritize, to restructure your plans, to understand that you'll be cutting back on your social life and your play dates and you probably won't be sleeping much at all. that's what it takes.

i found time in the quiet moments i should've been sleeping. i found time in the hours i could've been out with friends. i found time in the early mornings i should've been hitting the snooze button and in the evenings i should've been cleaning the kitchen. i found time on the weekends when i shirked family responsibilities and should have, but didn't, leave my house. i spent every single 3-day weekend and holiday break working, writing, reading, revising. i read industry blogs and studied query letters and scoured forums and rss feeds while waiting in lines and eating breakfast. i spent lunch breaks at the library, the bookstore, combing through stacks of books and touching individual spines and staring at covers and studying trends. i blogged every day, almost every single day, and promised myself i wouldn't give up. i told myself i couldn't. not now. not anymore.

there's no such thing as a schedule for your average writer. we don't have the luxury of staring out of windows and taking longer than 30 seconds to splash water on our faces. we're running on a quarter tank and we make it work however we can. the schedule is up to you. you'll find pockets of time you can no longer afford to squander. 90 second commercial breaks. five minutes while you're waiting for the kids to jump in the car. 10 minutes while the chicken cooks. half an hour in the waiting room at the doctor's office. 45 minutes at the DMV. the moments will arrive -- it's up to you how to use them.

writers are thieves. we steal moments and memories and now we steal minutes, too. we scramble for extra seconds and shove them in our pockets when no one is looking.

if you want to write, you make it work. you make time.

there's really no other way.

A HANDFUL OF THINGS

2011-05-06T11:21:00.000-07:00

1. i've gotten... a lot of questions about how to pronounce my name. so after many, many failed attempts at trying to spell it out phonetically, i just broke down and recorded my voice. so, i guess, if you're interested, you can hear me say it here. so... yeah. i'm going to delete it soon.

2. i just read A Northern Light and it was BEAUTIFUL. definitely one of the best books i've read in too long. i'm so late to this party but OMG if you haven't read it, definitely put that book on your TBR pile.

3. let's not kid ourselves, this is a cop out of a blog post.

4. this is really funny.

5. i'm beginning to realize that a lot of writing-related questions i get through my email are probably best answered on my blog -- if only because i think the answers might interest more than one person. so. if you have any questions (feel free to remain anonymous), you can go ahead and drop them in here, and i'll do my best to answer them in an upcoming blog post.

6. HOLY CRAP IT'S FRIDAY

have a great weekend, everyone! what's on YOUR TBR pile?

<3

WHEN YOU GET A FULL REQUEST

2011-04-28T22:25:00.000-07:00

(note: this is a repost from my tumblr account, on account of i'm too exhausted to properly blog today.)

when you respond to the email you're like

but in your head you're like

SHATTER ME ARC WINNERS

2011-04-26T22:17:00.000-07:00

okay, so, seriously?

this was INSANELY difficult to calculate, and mostly because i spent the majority of the time just staring at all the numbers, trying to figure out when i last used a calculator.

MATH IS HARD, GUYS.

also this really blew me away:

i don't even know how to say thank you for all of your enthusiasm. but thank you.
i can't tell you how much it means to me.

so, all that being said, i really, really, really wanted to give EVERYONE an ARC. but, unfortunately, i don't have 400+ ARCs to spare.

though i do have FOUR.

MMM HMMMM that's right, dear friends. i thought i'd only give one ARC away because i didn't think so many people would enter the contest. but now i think it's kind of cruel to only give away one ARC when there are so many entrants. the odds just aren't in anyone's favor.

so! i thought maybe a 1/100 chance would be better than a 1/400 chance, no?

(and anyway, let's be honest, you're not even reading any of this, are you? you've already scrolled down to see who's won the ARCs and you probably won't even notice if i just ramble on about the weather and cheese fries and how much self-control it requires to keep me from buying yet another pair of boots as we make our way toward the summer months. "ridiculous!" is what my father would say, i'm sure. "we live in southern california!" my brothers would point out. "what, do you just buy the entire store? do you leave any boots for other people in this world?" is my mother would ask me. ohhhhh i've heard it all before! BUT IT WON'T STOP ME!)

anyway.

THE WINNERS!!!

congratulations to:

WOOOOOOT!

if you ladies would please send me your mailing addresses at thmafi at gmail dot com, i will GLADLY send the books your way before the end of the week.

and to everyone: thank you thank you THANK YOU. thank you. thank you so much.

I PROMISE THERE WILL BE, LIKE, INFINITY BILLION MORE CHANCES TO WIN AN ARC. i'm supposed to get more copies of the ARC with the actual cover, too. i promise i will keep you posted.

-----

now you tell me:

what books are you most looking forward to in 2011??

HAPPY WEDNESDAY, EVERYONE!

THE SIX PHASES OF WRITING A NOVEL

2011-04-24T23:12:00.000-07:00

COCKINESS

WELL, HELL. if Snooki and Tyra can get published then i sure can i mean how hard can it be to write a freaking fiction novel, obviously not hard at all, i'll just throw some glitter on the page and make that adverb sparkle and i'll be a millionaire in 5 days oh and honey, go ahead and book that vacay we don't have enough money to pay for and i'm pretty sure the kids won't have to go to community college and end up like Chevy Chase because i hear writers make huge money GOD WHY DIDN'T I LOOK INTO THIS PROFESSION SOONER

CONFLICT

hm. so. yeah so we're pretty deep into this story, me and you, and you still don't seem to have a plot and you know, other people are kind of starting to talk? i'm hearing things around the blogosphere and maybe i wouldn't judge you so much, but apparently everyone ELSE thinks plots are really important? i mean don't get me wrong, i like you just the way you are and it's not like i'm trying to CHANGE you or anything, but maybe you should do a little more than just talk to your friends for 15 pages HEY HEY HEY LISTEN DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT -- I'M NOT TRYING TO PRESSURE YOU INTO ANYTHING I'M JUST SAYING I'M JUST -- IT'S -- THAT'S WHAT EVERYONE ELSE IS SAYING ABOUT YOU, NOT ME, IT WASN'T ME

SUBSERVIENCE

listen, please, I'M BEGGING YOU, just talk to me, tell me what you need i'll do ANYTHING, i'll massage the knots in your conjunctions and rub aloe vera on your comma splices if you'll just TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT FROM ME i don't understand why you're being so DIFFICULT, please, just send me a SIGN, show me what to do, how can you be so cruel what have i ever done to you WHY WOULD YOU MAKE A GROWN MAN CRY

JEALOUSY

you know what? i kind of hate you. why can't you be like all the other novels? why can't you be EASY? why is it that everyone else seems to have this all figured out and it's just YOU who refuses to cooperate? why do you INSIST ON BEING A SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE WHY CAN'T YOU BE A NORMAL MANUSCRIPT? why do i feel like i'm the only one in the world who's struggling like this? is it even POSSIBLE? are you doing this on PURPOSE? WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH AFTER EVERYTHING I'VE DONE FOR YOU I FREAKING INVENTED YOU

RELIEF

well THANK GOD that's over. at least now we can part friends. i can read you and admire you from a distance, appreciating all the blood, sweat, and expletives we've shared over the course of this endeavor. you've really ripened into a fine-looking manuscript. i'm proud of you. i'm so happy you were able to finally come around and recognize your many, many faults. but the pain is behind us now. we can move on. NOW, AT LAST, our millions are within reach.

HORROR

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN I HAVE TO REVISE THIS MANUSCRIPT

SEQUELS AND SERIES AND SYNOPSES, OH MY

2011-04-22T00:12:00.000-07:00

Molly asked....
So I wanted to ask you a question, because I know you used to be totally a panster. So now, are you still a panster? Is that even possible with a three book deal, bc don't they want synopsii? You always say that you learned something from each book you wrote, and I was just wondering how your processes have changed as you've written your various books, and what you thought was most helpful...?

Barbara asked...
As an aspiring author, I have a question. I'm currently submitting my first book in a series I have planned. Since Shatter Me is part of a series, did you have the entire thing outlined before you submitted your book one? The reason I ask is because there isn't a whole lot out there on series, aside of everyone telling you to move on from it if you don't "sell" your first book. I just want to know how prepared I should be with the rest of them!

Anonymous asked...
do you outline before writing a novel? if not, how did you manage to need only 1 revision before having SHATTER ME ready for querying?

-------

SO.

i get a lot of questions about writing a series, and these three questions were all so similar that i thought i'd try and answer them together. i hope this helps clarify some things.

i am still absolutely, wholeheartedly a pantser. i do not outline, i have never outlined, and i never write a book knowing exactly where it's going to end up. when i sent out the queries for SHATTER ME, i had only a vague idea of how the story would develop. i intentionally left loose threads in the first book -- few enough to keep it as a standalone novel, but just enough to give it the possibility for evolving into other books -- but i didn't focus my energy on developing intricate plots for the other books in the series. you should never count on your first book to sell, so you should always be working on a second different book, and not the second in a series. that way you'll always have fresh material to work with in case the first book doesn't sell.

that being said, regardless of whether you're a pantser or an outliner, you should always have an idea of where your story has the potential to go. know enough to be able to sketch it out in a couple of paragraphs; that's all you really need to pitch the series. (my synopsis for book 2 was about 2 pages, and my synopsis for book 3 was only 1 page.)

but a brief synopsis -- a general understanding, if you will -- of a story, does not an outline make. i think that, perhaps even more so for pantsers, having a very strong grasp on your characters is critical. you have to be able to trust them to guide you in the right direction -- you have to know their feelings and what's at risk for them. i finished writing book 2 about a month ago, and it took me about a month to write it. i just picked up where i left off with book 1 and, with the [aforementioned] general idea of where i knew things were headed, followed the story through by paying attention to my characters' wishes. no outlines necessary.

and a quick answer to Anon's question: i try very hard to write complete, chronological, cohesive first drafts. i edit as i write — reading and rereading everything i’ve already written every time i sit down to write again — and i’m extremely, extremely meticulous about it. (i hope i'm not making this process sound breezy, because it's not.) when i complete a first draft of a book, it’s usually very clean, but only because i like to start with as strong a first draft as possible. my post-completion revisions have never been incredibly rigorous -- just a lot of adding detail and dimension to things -- because i do most of the legwork in the first draft. this is not to say, however, that my drafts are perfect. i always spend time really trying to enhance the story in my second draft, fleshing it out and adding layers to characters and plot lines. i don't even know if it's successful, truly. i can only do my best.

but please note: these are the processes that work for me. they're not universally applicable processes -- and i don't want anyone to think that there is only one right or wrong way to approach a manuscript. in fact, the beauty of writing is that it's so unique to the author. it's a very personal, very intense, very all-consuming labor of love -- and that gives us each the right to tackle it the way we see fit.

this is something i had a really hard time coming to terms with, because before i got a book deal, a lot of people were telling me i was doing it wrong. people would tell me it wasn't possible to write a decent draft in such a short period of time, that it wasn't possible to be a pantser and write a cohesive novel not filled with plot holes and glaring errors. in short, i became convinced i was writing incorrectly. but i soon discovered that there is no incorrect way to write a novel. my efforts to change these things about myself didn't work. they weren't organic to me and what i needed to do. they were forced and unnatural. i had to revert back to what was comfortable for me.

so don't worry. don't feel like your process needs to be the same as everyone else's. people are going to try to tell you that you take too long to write or you don't take long enough. one person will tell you the story is boring and another will say it's too complex. in short, you have to be wary, because sometimes the feedback we hear from our fellow writers isn't right for us. sometimes we forget to be readers and instead advise writer-friends to write a book the way that we think it should be, instead of the way it should actually be for the author herself/himself.

honestly, all you really need to do is focus on writing the best book you possibly can, the best way you know how. that's the only thing that matters.

---

if you have any questions you'd like me to answer, please feel free to email me or leave a comment.

in the interim, you tell me:

are you a pantser or an outliner? and do you have any tips or tricks for writing a series?

HAPPY FRIDAY, EVERYONE!

i hope your weekend is full of wonder and delight.

HOW TO LAND AN AGENT AND A BOOK DEAL

2011-04-18T01:12:00.000-07:00

Matthew asked...
For a few years I've been working on a teen/YA novel (just like 80% of the country it seems), and while the current draft is far from submission quality, I was wondering how you were able to get into contact with a publisher like HarperTeen? By no means am I asking for you to read my manuscript, but I'm just curious as to the details on how you were able to effectively contact someone like Jodi Reamer and Harper.

so, Matthew was kind enough to allow me to post this question on my blog, because i think this is a BIG question.

it's a question that's basically asking: How do I get published?

and while i know that the majority of you who read this blog are all very intimately acquainted with the Query Letter and the Query Trenches and The Publishing Journey of Perseverance, i think there are a good number of quiet (lurking) readers who might not be as familiar with these things. and so. because i remember all too well what it was like to be dazed and confused in the face of Publishing: The 8th Wonder of the World, i want to touch on this subject. i want to talk about it. just a little bit.

THE QUERY LETTER OF WONDER

the query letter is your golden ticket to Hogwarts. it's one page and 15 seconds to capture an agent's attention. it's like Willy Wonka and Harry Potter had a baby and the result was this piece of paper that gave you a snazzy scar and a lifetime supply of chocolate to ease the pain of it all. because querying is hard as hell. it hurts like hell. it's like Voldemort is hanging out in your back pocket and your forehead is splitting open and Hermione won't stop yapping about you doing your Herbology homework and Cho Chang just decided to dump you for Robert Pattinson. then you get home only to find your mom has made cabbage soup, AGAIN, and maybe you want to throw your laptop out the window, but maybe you'll just bang your head against the wall for a few hours, you're not sure.

that's what it's like to query. seriously. i wish i were lying.

but to answer your question? this is exactly it. i queried. i queried and queried and queried. i queried bad and i queried okay and i queried mediocre until i learned to query ~~good~~ well. i studied the industry. i read a trillion agent/editor/author blogs. i ate books for breakfast and dinner. i studied the craft, the process, the rules and regulations. i DEVOURED the internet. Queryshark. Miss Snark. Nathan Bransford. The Rejectionist. Rachelle Gardner. Kristen Nelson. Editorial Ass. ten billionmillion others.

(spoiler alert: i still read all of these blogs. almost daily.)

then i joined the AbsoluteWrite forums and they changed my life. i scoured thread after thread dedicated to agency information. i made lists and spreadsheets and double-checked them against the information on Preditors and Editors. i lived and breathed agentquery.com and querytracker.net. i shoved books in my pockets and carried them with me to work. i googled until my fingers were covered in letters and my face was paper-mached in research. i spent countless nights hiding from laundry and social responsibilities just to be able to sit under flickering fluorescent lightbulbs and read one more article about landing an agent or undergoing revisions or what on earth an SNI was.

that's how i found Jodi Reamer.

which brings us to:

THE SUBMISSION PROCESS OF OH GOD THE AGONY

Jodi found HarperTeen, not me. because basically, if you're interested in being published with a "Big Publisher", most won't accept submissions from unagented manuscripts. this is why i first had to find an agent. once you write a query letter that's enticing enough to, well, entice, you send off your manuscript to the requesting agent. if the agent loves it, the agent will offer representation. once you've accepted representation, you then proceed to do one of two things:

1. Revise, and then go on submission to editors

2. Go on submission to editors

most people will spend some time working with their agents to polish their manuscripts. how much and how long is entirely dependent on you, your agent, and the state of your manuscript. either way, once both of you feel ready to pitch the book, your agent will compile a list of acquiring editors (at different publishing houses) who she thinks might like the book.

and then.

you wait.

response times vary. sometimes it takes a day. sometimes it takes two years. sometimes the book doesn't sell at all. there are no guarantees. you never know. you rip your heart out of your chest and you wrap it in a cover letter and toss it into the ocean. and you wait.

so my advice to you, Matthew, if you're seriously interested in getting published? is to learn everything. read everything. study all of it. try to understand as much as you can about the way things work.

and then finish your book.

finish it and revise until you've beaten the manuscript within an inch of its life and only then consider querying agents. you don't want to put out anything but your best work because you deserve the best. because it's never good to get eager and jump the gun. it almost never pays off.

so read blogs. read books. know your genre. understand what it means to be a writer in this new-fangled century and then own it. because it's not impossible. it's nothing you can't achieve. and though it may seem daunting in the beginning? the more you know, the less scary it becomes.

so hang tight!

keep your head up!

and write the best damn book you can write.

-----

what do you think, dear friends? can you suggest some of your favorite writer/agent/editor sites for Matthew to peruse? maybe share some tips and/or tricks you think will help him on his journey?

HAPPY MONDAY EVERYONE.

may your inboxes be bursting with full requests and agent offers in multiples of 1000.

SHATTER ME ARC CONTEST

2011-04-14T23:19:00.000-07:00

so i got these in the mail yesterday.

HYPERVENTILATION

and i figure it is TIME TO SHARE THE WEALTH.

i'm going to start by giving away only one copy, but! i promise there will be so many more opportunities to win a copy if you're interested!

SO LET'S HAVE A CONTEST, SHALL WE?

we're going to keep this super super simple. random.org is going to choose a winner, and to be eligible, all you have to do is leave me a comment telling me you want one.

that's it.

promotion is not necessary! but if you do tweet or blog or myface or spacebook or tumblr or post about it on your abandoned friendster account, please let me know in the comments.

+1 for every time you link to this contest on your twitter, facebook, etc. (up to 5 extra entries!)
+2 if you link to this post on your blog.
(please leave links so i can find them)

THAT'S IT! NO STRINGS! NO RULES!

well, except that the contest will end NEXT SUNDAY, April 24th, 2011 at 11:59 PST.

THIS CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED.

and maybe if there are a lot of people interested in an ARC, then, i don't know, maybe random.org will choose two winners or something? i don't know. it depends. hopefully you actually want an ARC.

otherwise i guess i can give them to my mom?

hehe

HAPPY FRIDAY, EVERYONE!
may your weekends be full of wonder and whimsy and magic.

<3

p.s. just FYI: i don't mind if you live across the street or across the pond; my contests are always, always international.

SHATTER ME ARC UPDATE

2011-04-13T22:39:00.000-07:00

HAPPY THURSDAY, EVERYONE!

some things, it seems, are HAPPENING? i just got word that my ARCs (Advance Reader Copies) should arrive in the mail today, and then a lovely friend on twitter happened to find my ARC at TLA!

it is kind of blowing my mind, just a little bit.

this whole thing is hilarious because i haven't even gotten my own copies yet -- i haven't even gotten my first pass pages yet (which means i have no idea what the inside of the book looks like) -- but already the ARC is popping up at this conference. it is very EXCITING. and scary. but mostly EXCITING!

so, here is some info on some stuff.

i've gotten a lot a lot of questions about the cover, namely, where is it, and why can't we see it, and are you hiding it from us? and this question i understand completely, especially since my book is already in ARC form and so, if it is in ARC form, then surely there must be a cover. right?

not so!

the plan for my ARC is a little different because we are on a slightly accelerated schedule. therefore! my ARC is going out in two waves. the first set of ARCs are going out with just a fancy title text on a plain background, and the second set will have cover art. the ARCs with cover art are supposed to be at BEA, so hopefully i'll have a cover to share with you before then.

in the interim, here is what the first-wave ARC looks like:

you will notice how it matches my updated website. SHINY.

anddddd here is what it looks like in the real world!

courtesy of dearest Jenny Martin, who took the photo at TLA

basically, this is all just to say that if you are at TLA, and if you are interested, maybe you can try to find a copy? maybe? and then maybe send one to me, on account of i still haven't even seen what it looks like yet?

he hee

and i promise that just as soon as i have the okay to share the final cover art, you will certainly be the first to know!

HEARTS SO MANY HEARTS

------

onto another subject! i have asked Super Agent Jodi Reamer if she would answer some questions for an interview on this here little blog, and she has kindly consented to this.

SO!

is there anything you'd like me to ask Jodi? anything you'd like to know re: the publishing industry?

i might be able to sneak some of your questions in.

BEA UPDATE

2011-04-12T09:35:00.000-07:00

HELLO AGAIN!

i've gotten some questions about the specifics of my BEA stuff via email and tumblr and twitter messages, so! i contacted my publicist to find out whether or not i can share some of that information with you.

and i cannnnn

and as of right now, i can tell you i will be doing these things:

Tuesday May 24

10:30-12:00PM
"Speed Dating with Children's Authors" - open to booksellers & librarians only
Room: 1E09/10

1:00PM-1:30PM
Signing SHATTER ME - Table 10, formal autographing area

6:00PM-8:00PM
HarperCollins/Brian Murray BEA Party, held at The Park - by invitation only.

Note: Speed Dating is only open to booksellers & librarians, but the signing is open to anyone with a BEA badge.

SO IF YOU ARE GOING TO BEA YOU SHOULD TOTALLY COME IT WOULD BE AWESOME

are you going to BEA? yes?

yes?

of course you are.

right?

HARRY POTTER ON HIS JOURNEY TO PUBLICATION

2011-04-06T21:01:00.000-07:00

hee heee you're welcome.

happy thursday everyone!

NAKED IN THE MIDDLE OF KMART

2011-04-04T21:49:00.000-07:00

yeah.

getting a book published is almost exactly like every time your mother walked in on you dancing in your underwear. it's like seventh grade when you peed your pants in the middle of a pep rally and it's like the summer before high school when your best friend pulled your shorts down in front of all the cool kids and you kept trying to explain that it was laundry day it was laundry day for pete's sake

it's like finding yourself naked in the middle of Kmart.

everyone is staring, watching you twitch with your undies around your ankles and they're gaping, gawking, gazing up at you as you shiver next to the discount racks and they blink, they say how could you and why would you and oh boy oh boy oh boyyyy

we worry, you know?

we spend so much time writing in solitude that even though we want to be published we're not sure if we want our mothers and fathers and babysitters and gym teachers to read the words we wrote in private. sometimes we get scared. sometimes we hold back. sometimes we're afraid to be honest in our writing because we're afraid someone will see our transparency and stake us for it.

but that kind of writing is no good.

you can't be afraid when you write. you can't write like your mother is looking over your shoulder because then your words will be just as dishonest as they were that night you said you were studying at Jenny's house. no one believed it then, and no one will believe it now. the best writing comes from the deepest, richest parts of who we are. it's the passion, the pain, the agonizing embarrassment and the joy bursting in your heart. it's when someone tries to take a peek at your word document and you stutter, you stammer, you jump up, you slam your laptop shut and look around the room like you've been caught kissing your pillow. again.

those words will set you free. there's liberty in writing the hard, the honest, the truth. there's beauty in it. there's real, raw, organic feeling in it. you will transform when you let go. your words will sing and skip across the page and your thoughts will jumble into senseless forms that your fingers fumble to decipher and you're spilling ink, you're staining your keyboard with heart and heartache and the bittersweet wonder of life. you're rapunzel rapunzel and you must let down your hair.

escape.

one day they will read it. one day they will see it. one day you'll have to face your fears and your phantoms and it'll sting. it'll hurt, maybe, maybe it'll hurt like hell. but sometimes it's worth it. sometimes you have to break free of the confines of your own mind. you have to shatter the walls wedged into your imagination. you have to tell everyone-and-their-mother to get the hell out of your head.

because one day your book will be out there. one day you'll be stripped naked and strapped to the blue light special and someone will try to shake your hand. they'll say hey, where'd you get your inspiration from? true stories? real people? your father, perhaps?

and you'll say listen Bob, i have no idea. my entire life is a work of fiction.

everything is fair game.

write on, dear friends.

write like no one is watching.

<3

---

this post was inspired entirely by a twitter conversation, just fyi.

CATCH UP AND MUSTARD

2011-04-02T12:08:00.000-07:00

GOOD SATURDAY, EVERYONE!

i know, you are astounded, right? it's Saturday and i'm blogging, i must be quite beside myself with the crazy today. lucky for you, this is only partially true.

THERE ARE THINGS! things i forgot to take care of and/or tell you about.

1. WE HAD A CONTEST. there was a contest winner! and i completely forgot to make this announcement. so! the winner of the $20 amazon gift card is Rachel Stark! CONGRATULATIONS!

Rachel, if you would please contact me at thmafi at gmail dot com, i will send that gift card your way.

2. YOU CAN WIN AN ARC OF SHATTER ME. this ARC was generously donated by my publicist to the ladies over at Write Hope in their effort to raise funds for Japan relief. the auction for the item is now live, and you can find more info HERE. bidding will be open until April 6th, 4pm EST.

this is, unfortunately, not a giveaway, in that you do have to bid to win it, but! all the money goes to charity! and i am quite excited about this prospect, if only because it is the first online opportunity anyone will have to win an ARC. it is kind of like hoping someone will ask you to prom, only what if they don't? and then you have to go to prom with your cousin and he tells everyone he's your cousin and we all know how that turns out.

so! if you are interested! you can maybe bid on it. and then when you win, maybe send it to ME, on account of i don't even have a copy yet, so this is me, smooshing my face up against the window, trying to read over your shoulder.

3. THANK YOU SO MUCH. to all of you who've added SHATTER ME on Goodreads, contacted me just to tell me how excited you are for the book, wrote blog posts or sent me an email just to say congratulations, and to every single person who's emailed, tweeted, messaged and facebooked me to tell me you've pre-ordered the novel.

it feels a lot like crying, these feelings.

i'm so blown away.

<3

HITTING IT BIG AND HOW TO DO IT

2011-03-30T21:49:00.000-07:00

Bethany Robison asked...
I know I personally have been following your blog, watching you try to get the "big break" and my thought has been, "Geez, if T can't break through, who can?" It seems to me that you were doing everything right - you had multiple complete manuscripts, an agent, a big (and loyal :)) blog following - what changed to enable the breakthrough? Was it just a matter of time and persistence, or did you actually start doing something different?

here is the truth:

we're not much different, you and i. we daydream at our day jobs about the days when we might spend our waking hours luxuriating in the arms of the written word. we're architects. historians. builders and purveyors. give us 26 letters and we'll construct monuments, galaxies, human philosophies about love and hope and horrible, beautiful, breathtaking adventures.

we need 26 letters to change the world.

so we write. we write every day, we fight every day, we think and scheme and dream a little dream every day. manuscripts pile up in the kitchen sink, run-on sentences dangle around our necks. we plant purple prose in our gardens and snip the adverbs only to thread them in our hair. we write with no guarantees, no certainties, no promises of what might come and we do it anyway.

this is who we are. we're punched in the face for every rejection that stacks up in our inbox. we're tossed off a cliff for every time an agent says no to our full. we bang our heads against our desks and wonder if we're wasting our time. we look around at our friends and co-workers and envy them their one full-time job, their ability to be satisfied with just enough and we wonder, we really wonder if we've lost our sanity.

the chances are slim to none, they say.

they say hey why don't you go back to school or hey maybe tuck in your shirt and hey how about Katie's kid? you know, the one in law school and oh, i hear she's graduating this year so how's that little story of yours coming along? they look at us like we're cute, like this phase will eventually end and we'll come to our senses, we'll wake up and get a real job and maybe we'll even get a haircut and it hurts. it's like a toothpick caught in your throat and you're choking but you're not crying, not quite, not just yet and no one understands.

and sometimes you want to quit.

every day you want to throw an expletive in the air and you don't really care where it lands you're just frustrated and rejection hurts, it hurts like hell and when will this ever end? when will you catch a break? why is it that every day someone else has an agent or a book deal and a goddamn golden retriever and what about you, why not you, you know what why don't i just kick a proper noun in the face.

the tricky part is pushing past those moments.

the secret is fighting when it hurts the most. when you think it's over, when you've tried everything, you've given it everything and it's still not working. the test is in the time and time again. it's in the hundreds of rejections that would make a grown man cry and it's in the heart and soul you've poured into every word on that page. you have to keep fighting no matter what.

trust yourself. trust that you are doing what you love and don't lose sight of that. there is no method to this madness and there is only one guarantee. there is only one thing in publishing -- and in life -- that is an absolute, verified guarantee.

if you give up, the game is over.

i've done exactly the same thing i've always done: i've avoided social responsibilities, inhaled too much caffeine, read far too many books and spent countless hours huddled in a small corner with only my laptop and my imagination. and somehow i got a book published.

so keep fighting.

keep writing.

and invite Rejection to get hit by a bus.

A NEW KIND OF QUERY ASSISTANT

2011-03-28T23:35:00.000-07:00

hee heeeeee

HAPPY TUESDAY, EVERYONE!

BECAUSE I'D LIKE TO RIDE A LLAMA TO WORK EVERY DAY

2011-03-27T22:44:00.000-07:00

what a bamf.

HAPPY MONDAY EVERYONE.

what kind of animal would you like to ride to work every day?

<3

---

ALSO: I HAVE FINISHED THE FIRST DRAFT OF BOOK 2! HUZZAH! which is why you get this blog post about llamas.

but llamas are awesome anyway, so, really, everyone wins.

THERE ARE TOO MANY EXCLAMATION POINTS IN THIS POST

2011-03-23T21:47:00.000-07:00

HAPPY THURSDAY EVERYONE!

here are a couple of things to know:

IF YOU HAVE EMAILED ME in, like, the last couple of weeks? rest assured that i have received your email! but i am so sorry; it's going to take me a little while to dig through my inbox right now. i think i've answered exactly 3 people outside of my editor and my agent [and The Rejectionist who is always kind enough to send me funny cat videos]. but i do get all of your emails! and i read them! and i love them and i thank you for them.

i promise i will find a way to swim through everything fairly soon.

I WILL BE AT BEA! i just got confirmation on this last week. i'll probably be attached to Jodi's hip the entire time, but if you have plans to be at BEA (details here) please do let me know because i would like to say hello to you! in fact, i'll be doing a signing for my book! (which will be available at BEA!) SO PLEASE COME BECAUSE WHAT IF NO ONE COMES!

that would be sad.

I'M NOW ON FACEBOOK! i know, it's weird, right? facebook is so weird. but i won't be using it as a regular profile, so thank you very, very much for all of the friend requests, but i'll only be using facebook as a page. you can find me HERE! also maybe you can teach me how to use this thing.

THANK YOU FOR ALL THE ARC ENTHUSIASM! as soon as i actually have the ARCs in my possession and have clearance to give one or some away in any kind of contest, you will be the very first to know. i promise on Charlie Sheen's favorite t-shirt.

IN THE INTERIM! let's have a little contest of our own.

to play, just answer this question in the comments:

as a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?

and random.org will choose a winner for a $20 amazon gift card!
contest closes Sunday, March 27 at 11:59pm PST.

HAPPY EVERYTHING, EVERYONE!
i do hope all is well with YOU.

<3

SOOO... NOW I HAVE A MOVIE DEAL

2011-03-21T14:49:00.000-07:00

so. here is the sequel to part one.

this little line snuck into the PublishersWeekly post:

HC Children's Throws Down for Debut
In a major pre-empt, Tara Weikum, editorial director at HarperTeen, took North American rights to a trilogy by 23-year-old debut novelist Tahereh Mafi, the first book of which is titled Shatter Me. Jodi Reamer at Writers House brokered the three-book deal. The story follows Juliette, a girl who kills people with her touch. According to HC, the series blends "a crumbling dystopian world with a compelling heroine who has inexplicable powers." The U.S. acquisition follows a number of foreign sales, with rights bought in 13 countries including Brazil, China, France, Germany, and Russia; it's also rumored that the book has already been optioned in Hollywood. HarperTeen has scheduled Shatter Me for November 15, 2011.

and i've gotten a lot of questions about it that i couldn't answer!
so... now, here is the answer, from Variety.com:

Fox to adapt 'Shatter Me' novel
Studio, Chernin Entertainment to produce pic
By RACHEL ABRAMS

EXCLUSIVE: Twentieth Century Fox has acquired bigscreen rights to young adult novel "Shatter Me" by Tahereh Mafi.

Peter Chernin and Dylan Clark will produce the project through Fox-based Chernin Entertainment.

Emma Watts, Peter Kang and Daria Cercek will oversee the project for the studio.

Set in a dystopian world, "Shatter Me" is the story of a 17-year-old girl imprisoned for possessing a fatal touch. As she watches everything crumble around her, she must choose between relinquishing her power or use it to save the world.

HarperCollins will release the tome later this fall.

-----

anddddd... i do believe that's all.

<33

SHATTER ME ARCs!

2011-03-13T21:00:00.000-07:00

HAPPY MONDAY, EVERYONE!

so, here is some exciting news: i am going to have ARCs for SHATTER ME by the end of the month! so, basically in about 2 weeks!

HUZZAH!
IT'S A BOOK!

that being said, i think, if you are interested, perhaps i will have a an ARC contest?

are you interested?

in other news: i was supposed to finish writing Book 2 last week but i got so distracted by all of the tinterwebs and the announcements and such that i was suddenly too tired and unfocused to get much work done. therefore! i will be scant this week on account of i am quite determined to finish writing the last 10k of this book, mostly because i am very curious to see what happens! cue intrigue.

and then we shall resume normal activities.

SO WHO WANTS AN ARC?

9 THINGS EVERYONE NEEDS TO KNOW ABOUT WRITERS

2011-03-09T23:29:00.000-08:00

1. WE ARE WORKING. when you call and ask us to hang out (thank you kindly for the invitation!) and we say something to the effect of What ho! Sorry there, friend! Can't do, today! Working on the manuscript! and you LAUGH AT US? wellllllllll let's just say maybe we will be writing you into the first book in our series and maybe you will not show up in the second.

which brings us to:

2. YES IT IS A REAL JOB. maybe you sit in a cubicle or a fancy office all day and when you get home in the evenings you get to do something like watch a program on your television contraption. or maybe you look forward to your weekends because you get to spend time with family and/or friends who don't exist entirely inside of your internets, or maybe you still remember what it's like to taste fresh air. but 99% of writers work TWO full-time jobs. we work the day job to finance the dream and we forfeit weekends and forget family functions and fail to feed our children at regular intervals and if you think we don't take this thing seriously then maybe we will construct an unflattering metaphor inspired entirely by your person! and in our weak moments we will remind ourselves that though you may not squint in the face of natural light, WE WOULD TOTALLY OWN YOU IN A GAME OF SCRABBLE.

also?

3. WE ARE NOT REBUILDING THE WHEEL. people have written books before! this has gone on for a very long time, actually, and what we are doing is not actually as weird and strange as you think it is! maybe now you can stop staring at us like we've just eaten the hind leg of a mule.

speaking of which,

4. WE WROTE ALMOST ALL OF YOUR FAVORITE MOVIES. it's true! maybe google it, it is ALL OVER THE TINTERWEBS. so many brilliant novels have been adapted for the big screen, entertained the masses and won billions and trillions of awards. we are definitely the reason you and your Romantic Interest bonded at the movies and eventually fell in love and lived happily ever after. you're welcome.

and no,

5. WE'RE NOT CRAZY. maybe we are a little bit crazy, actually, there's no way of knowing for sure. but it's not our fault if we happen to enjoy the company of characters who can do/have done/will do things you've never even dared to contemplate. also the economy is tough right now. it's cheaper for them to live inside of our heads.

oh, and

6. WE DO NOT, IN FACT, HAVE A LOT OF FREE TIME. so please refrain from saying things like, "Oh I've always wanted to write a book, I've just never had the time, how nice for you that you can sit around and be a dreamer" because it makes us feel a little bit like crying and yelling simultaneously, mostly because we are so exhausted from our two full-time jobs (please see #2), our families, our laundry baskets, our homework assignments and our crying children that we cannot even find the words to tell you just how little we enjoy being patronized.

so do not be surprised that

7. WE WILL NOT WRITE A BOOK ABOUT YOU. please stop asking.

but!

8. WE WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE IT IF YOU WOULD COOK US DINNER EVERY NIGHT, ALSO SOMEONE NEEDS TO DO THE LAUNDRY, THAT WOULD BE EXCELLENT. it's been scientifically proven that writers have a difficult time maintaining any kind of active interest in household duties and/or activities while drafting a novel. maybe you should invest in a cookbook in order to keep us from starving to death, because really, we might forget to eat anything but caffeine and chocolate. also it will take us a long time to do the laundry, so maybe you should consider showering with your clothes on.

oh and one last thing. and this one is the most important:

9. WE ARE NEVER GOING TO STOP WRITING. not ever. so if you plan on being a part of our lives we highly recommend you fasten your seatbelt, on account of we will probably be trying to write down bits of dialogue and inspiration while driving this station wagon.

MMM HMMMMM

<3

CONFESSIONS OF A BOOK DEAL

2011-03-08T20:15:00.000-08:00

first and foremost, i want to say thank you, thank you, thank you so, so much for all of your unbelievably kind words and wishes on this post, on twitter, and in my inbox. i'm so humbled, so awed and inspired by your support. your friendship has been a steady, solid thing this past year that i've joined the writing community, and your generous comments, your unwavering enthusiasm, your many, many emails about all things funny, hopeful, discouraged and helpful have always been the bright spot in my day, no matter the setbacks in this journey. so many of us are chipping away at this Mountain We Call Publishing, trying to carve a clear path for ourselves and so far i've found it to be a world of patience and discovery and a million reminders to persevere every single day. to never give up. to never surrender.

i hope you never doubt your potential to be extraordinary.

i've gotten a lot of emails since the announcement -- questions about any number of things pertaining to the book deal. a lot of the questions were very similar, so i thought i'd answer them here on the blog. i hope this helps clarify some things.

so.

How long have you had to wait to make the announcement?

almost exactly three months.

this has been particularly hard for me only because in this three-month period, i've completed my editorial revisions, my line-edits and my copy-edits. (the book is now almost completely finished. it's already gone to design, and we should have ARCs fairly soon.) i'm also almost finished writing the second book in the series.

all of this took quite a bit of time out of my life -- and i couldn't speak a single word of it to anyone, if only just to apologize about my response time on emails, my lackluster blog posts, my absence in the blogosphere, or even my daily tweets obsessing over just how much i miss my mattress.

suffice it to say i have been very tired lately. so happy! but very sleepy.

Your book is coming out this year! That's so soon! Is that normal?

i should start by saying that i don't think anything is normal in publishing. but my pub date does seem very soon, if only because of the three-month waiting period in between the deal and the announcement. i guess it is a little sooner than normal though, because it'll be hitting shelves less than a year from deal to release. this decision is entirely up to the publisher.

What is a pre-empt?

i've gotten this question from so many people! it's a term i wasn't familiar with for a long time, too. a pre-empt basically means the publisher makes a preemptive offer on the book -- one that they hope is appealing enough to prevent the book from going to auction with multiple bidders.

Do you have a cover? When will we get to see the cover?

i don't have a cover yet, but i will definitely keep you posted. :D

Can I pre-order your book? Is it on Amazon?

so, i have to say that i'm really blown away that i'm even getting asked this question. but what's really cool is that my book is, in fact, already up on Amazon. so... yes. if you're interested, you can pre-order my book right here. kind of crazy.

Are you on Goodreads? Will you be my friend?

yes! and yes! you can find me here.

Can I interview you on my blog? Can I set up a blog tour for your book? Are you interested in participating in [insert author feature] on my site?

thank you again and again for your offers! unfortunately, i can't commit to anything without my publicist's approval. her name is Allison Verost, and if you're interested, you can always contact her at Allison[dot]Verost[at]HarperCollins[dot]com.

Will we get to read an excerpt of your book? Can you share the first chapter?

oooh, probably not for a very long time. haha. in truth, i have no real idea. that decision is entirely up to my publisher. but for now, actual text from the book is basically under lock and key.

i am quite excited for you to read the book, though :D

---

there are a lot more questions that i hope to answer soon, but i don't want to overload you with too much at once. if you happen to have any new questions, please feel free to leave them in the comments, and i will definitely do my best to answer them.

thanks again for everything -- for all of your enthusiasm!
it's been wonderfully, amazingly, incredibly, adverbially overwhelming. hehe.

happy wednesday, everyone.

<3

SO... I GUESS I HAVE A BOOK DEAL

2011-03-07T10:40:00.000-08:00

10 E 53rd Street, New York, New York 10022-5299

Allison Verost, Assistant Director of Publicity

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

HARPERCOLLINS ACQUIRES HIGHLY-ANTICIPATED DYSTOPIAN TRILOGY FROM DEBUT AUTHOR TAHEREH MAFI IN MAJOR PRE-EMPT DEAL

The first novel, Shatter Me, to be published November 2011

New York, NY (March 2, 2011) – HarperCollins Children’s Books announced today that it has acquired North American rights to Shatter Me, a debut novel by Tahereh Mafi. Shatter Me is the first book in a riveting trilogy about a girl named Juliette who has the ability to kill people with a single touch—and the power to save her shattered world. Combining a crumbling dystopian world with a compelling heroine who has inexplicable powers, Shatter Me is a mesmerizingly romantic thriller with major teen appeal.

The three-book deal was negotiated by Tara Weikum, an Editorial Director at HarperTeen, an imprint of HarperCollins Children’s Books, with Jodi Reamer of Writers House, in a major preempt. The book is scheduled for publication on November 15, 2011.

Tara Weikum commented, “Shatter Me has everything that we love in teen novels: fascinating characters, an imaginative world, a heart-stopping adventure, a spellbinding romance, and desperately high stakes.”

Foreign rights to Shatter Me have already been sold in thirteen countries after a series of unprecedented pre-emptive offers were received within days of submission. Rights have been sold to Australia, Brazil, China, France, Germany, Greece, Holland, Hungary, Italy, Poland, Russia, Sweden, and Turkey.

Twenty-three year old Tahereh Mafi is a recent college graduate, and she lives outside of Los Angeles, California. Shatter Me is her first novel.

andddddddddd this, from PublishersWeekly.

HC Children's Throws Down for Debut
In a major pre-empt, Tara Weikum, editorial director at HarperTeen, took North American rights to a trilogy by 23-year-old debut novelist Tahereh Mafi, the first book of which is titled Shatter Me. Jodi Reamer at Writers House brokered the three-book deal. The story follows Juliette, a girl who kills people with her touch. According to HC, the series blends "a crumbling dystopian world with a compelling heroine who has inexplicable powers." The U.S. acquisition follows a number of foreign sales, with rights bought in 13 countries including Brazil, China, France, Germany, and Russia; it's also rumored that the book has already been optioned in Hollywood. HarperTeen has scheduled Shatter Me for November 15, 2011.

-----

so... yeah.

that happened.

A CONVERSATION WITH THE REJECTIONIST

2011-03-06T19:06:00.000-08:00

so this is how i spent part of my weekend.

dearest Rejectionist in GRAY

yours truly in GREEN

i win everything.

HAPPY MONDAY, EVERYONE!

A LESSON IN PUNCTUATION: The 3 Act Structure

2011-03-03T20:48:00.000-08:00

HEE HEE.

HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE, AND HAPPY GRAMMAR DAY!

CHECKLIST: 50 Important Things To Do Before Writing a Novel

2011-03-02T19:48:00.000-08:00

1. feed your cat.
2. check your email.
3. update your status on facebook.
4. tweet something particularly witty. wait for the @ replies sure to follow.
5. make coffee.
6. check your email.
7. buy a new laptop. tell the sales guy that you're going to write a novel.
8. buy new shoes while you're buying your laptop. maybe you'll be walking a lot when you write this novel, you're not sure, you don't want to limit yourself.
9. stare at the walls.
10. check your email.
11. remind people via another facebook update that you're too busy to hang out, just in case they've forgotten that you're going to write a novel.
12. update your facebook page with pictures of your cat.
13. clear out all the blogs unread in your google reader. and by "clear out", you mean read all 163 of them.
14. call your mother.
15. check your email.
16. tell your mother that you won't be able to take her on tour with you, but thanks for everything and those nine months, etc etc
17. buy a lot of chocolate.
18. call your friends to let them know that you're going to be really busy, and not to invite you to anything, just in case they were going to, on account of you're so busy writing this new book.
19. drink a lot of coffee.
20. decide you're going to need a new wardrobe for when you go on tour without your mother.
21. seriously consider quitting your job, because you've heard writers make a crapton of money.
22. turn on your new laptop.
23. realize you have no idea how to use a mac. ignore this detail.
24. eat 90% of the chocolate you've just purchased.
25. wonder how many children you'll have to sell in order to buy the iPad 2.
26. scratch the back of your head.
27. stare at all the books on your shelf. ponder upon how quickly you will be joining their ranks.
28. stare at your word document.
29. eat a banana.
30. answer your phone on the first ring. try to convince the caller that even though they dialed a wrong number, you're actually wildly entertaining, and they should give you a chance.
31. check your email.
32. stand up.
33. sit down.
34. stare out the window.
35. try to count how long you can hold your breath.
36. clear your throat.
37. call your mother, tell her you've changed your mind, maybe you'll let her come on tour if she buys you an iPad 2.
38. check the news. try not to throw up. quickly defer to the entertainment outlets updating you on Justin Bieber's latest exploits.
39. check your email.
40. wonder why no one has responded to your witty tweet yet.
41. consider calling your friends to remind them of your busy schedule, just in case they forgot.
42. try on your new shoes.
43. accidentally step on the new laptop you left on the floor, right next to the box of shoes.
44. inspect the laptop for damage. find it broken.
45. curse the fates for coming between you and your novel-writing. you were so ready to write that book before this tragedy occurred.
46. tell everyone how your novel writing has been hindered because of circumstances outside of your control.
47. shake your fist at the heavens.
48. wait for your computer to be repaired.
49. pick up your newly repaired computer.
50. repeat steps 1-50.

----------------

in other news: congratulations to Caitlin R. O'Connell! you've won a $30 amazon gift card! if you would please email me at thmafi at gmail dot com, i will send it right over.

HAPPY THURSDAY EVERYONE!

<3

BECAUSE NO ONE DOES THIS ANYMORE

2011-02-24T20:46:00.000-08:00

HAPPY FRIDAY!

MAXIMUM OCCUPANY

2011-02-21T21:49:00.000-08:00

seriously, i'm kind of embarrassed.
why does this keep happening?

this picture was taken at Serendipity 3! in new york. with @tanagandhi's trusty camera.

SO THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU START WRITING BOOKS

2011-02-17T20:01:00.000-08:00

i was looking through my phone for a note i'd written myself recently, and i found a BOATLOAD of abandoned and forgotten notes i'd written myself over the past year. i don't have any idea what half of them even mean.

FOR EXAMPLE:

We haven't eaten anything substantive til 10am!
-You mean since 7am.

It's murphy's law!
-Yeah! wait what's murphy's law again?
Everything that can go wrong will go wrong
-Oh that happens to me all the time.

Someone needs to steal a motorcycle

Sticky picky

We're not getting any older
DON'T PUT THAT IN YOUR BLOG

Making weird voices

7?
-how about 730?
715.
-715? I'M NOT AN OVERACHIEVER

Connectatron

Nearly get crushed by stick thing
police: YOU GOT IT CHAMP

He looks like a movie star

Do you want to get the stuff?

The earth fell sideways

EXIT EXIT EXIT OMG THE SIGN

E 64th

Bing bing

Took cab ride with bipolar man?

-----

i wish i were making this up.

what about YOU?
do you ever leave yourself strange messages you can't decipher later??

HAPPY FRIDAY, EVERYONE!
may your weekend be full of clarity :D

GUEST POST: The Real Reason Writers Should Read

2011-02-11T00:00:00.000-08:00

By: Claudie A.

I had a vision, fellow writers, beautiful and terrifying, and it concerned all of us.

It started with one of us in a busy office, with a tiny wooden desk and large jam-packed bookshelves. The room was cramped by endless piles of books gathered through the years that no longer fit the shelves. You know what they are.

Recommendations from friends. Gifts from siblings. The hyped-book from a decade ago that you never got around to reading. Old classics everybody read except for you. Books with gorgeous covers you picked out.

The TBR pile.

Hundreds of books perched precariously atop one another.
Looming disaster.

One morning, a caffeinated writer-friend touched the pile. A light brush, like the whisper of the wind. The books swayed for a moment. He held his breath. The pile crashed down, cracking the floor with its weight and causing the whole building to shake.

The beginning of the biggest catastrophe known to man.

The tremor from this pile caused others to fall, and suddenly TBR piles everywhere were shaken and thrown down, shaking the ground and affecting more piles, all in an endless loop of positive retroaction. The collective force caused earthquakes that put 2012 to shame. It ripped the Californian peninsula off and spread through Alaska to Russia, and then to the whole of Europe.

Everywhere across the globe, the towering piles of books created by procrastinating writers crashed, ripping apart the world as we know it.

Now I know the risks, and so do you. To your TBR piles, fellow writers! Read on, fast and steady! We cannot neglect our duty any longer.

Claudie A. is a 21-year-old French biochemistry student, NaNoWriMo ML and obsessive fantasy writer with an unhealthy love for pencils, coffee and goats. But there's no goats on the blog. She tries to hide that one.

--------------

Tahereh's note:

and with that, dear friends, i'd like to bid you a farewell! i hope you spend this weekend luxuriating in a quiet place with a stack of good books and a delicious cup of something warm.

i'll be back with regular posts on Monday!

GUEST POST: Spelling And Grammer Matter’s

2011-02-10T00:00:00.000-08:00

By: Tracey Neithercott

Maybe because I’m a former copyeditor. But I’m incredibly Passionate about proper grammer and spelling because if you don’t have those things it can be very hard to understand sentences, your reader’s won’t want to waste they’re Time on you’re Book or you even if you think its good.

Editors and Agents too. They don’t like to read submissions from writer whom use inproper grammer or spelling even if you execute the story part good. Plenty of people say that its the storytelling that matters really but its not its a mix of Storytelling and Knowing how to write, that includes grammer and spelling and all that. Writers that submit they’re novels which are chalk full of mistakes frequently are rejected!

See Agent’s and editors’ don’t have a lot of time to waste deciphering bad-written novels; even if they may think the story is better than Harry Potter and Hunger Games and Twilight combined into one sparkling magical war book and even if they like you’re other ideas.

They just don’t want to waste there time making you’re Book understandable to readers. Those are you’re job.

Give yourself with a grammer book some help! Fine a astonishingly good text that can teach you the basic Principle’s of the English language and that you read on you’re own Time so that you can get better at the writing part. Also for spelling. It for some people is worser.

When it’s spelled good and has all the grammer right, you can submit a book that is your best work.

Just between you and I, learning the rules to the grammer isn’t the easiest thing but the good news is that its possible. Don’t loose hope!

Tracey Neithercott is a health journalist and former copy editor who writes YA fiction when she should be sleeping. She attempts to use proper grammar on her blog, Words on Paper.

GUEST POST: Point of View - Which to Choose?

2011-02-09T00:00:00.000-08:00

By: Jennifer Burke

Which narrative have you chosen?

First person narrative

I like first person narrative. It enables me to relate my inner-most thoughts while also narrating the action. It is the simplest form of narrative, concentrating on a singular point of view, my point of view, as both the narrator and a character in the novel. I am telling you everything you need to know about events, aren’t I? I have no reason to lie.

I love unreliable first person narrators.

Second person narrative

You are tempted to write in second person. You like the sense of immediacy, of inclusion. You feel it puts you in the middle of the story:

Your boots pound on the asphalt as you are pursued into the alley. You sense he is close. You crouch behind the dumpster. You feel the blood pumping in your skull as you wait for the knife to descend.

You feel a sinking sense of realisation as you read it back. It doesn’t bring immediacy. How can it? You’re not being chased by a homicidal maniac. You’re reading a story. Also, you would never hide behind a dumpster because you’re not in America.* You’d hide behind a skip or an industrial bin.

Second person is useful for some things. You know rhetoric would fall flat without it. You can also use it in internal dialogue, for that sort of snarky voice that sometimes narrates your life: Second person? You must be joking! You realise that voice is right. Second person hasn’t done your story any favours. Italo Calvino, Iain Banks and Margaret Atwood might be able to do it, but it just makes you sound like a pretentious wanker.

Third person narrative

Third person is useful for novels with very large casts of characters. Sweeping historical dramas, epic fantasies and that sort of thing. If God has a point of view, this is it. Specifically, third person omniscient. Third person omniscient is where the narrator shares information that the character does not know. For example: Roland had twelve days left to live.

The more usual type of third person narrative is objective. Third person objective doesn’t know that Roland is allergic to bees until he blunders into the hive. It comes as a shock to Roland as well.

Jennifer Burke lives in a house that once had possums in the roof. She hates those possums.

*Tahereh's note: The lovely Jennifer Burke is from the equally as lovely Australia.

GUEST POST: How to Become BFF With Your Favorite Author

2011-02-08T00:00:00.000-08:00

By: Maine Character

Stephen King would like you to believe that to have your favorite author over for dinner, all you have to do is live with an axe and a pig by a snow-covered road and wait for your chance. But the truth is, those days are over. In today’s world, you have to be proactive.

1) The best way to make an impression on an author is to prove you’re an author, too, so when you show up at their house, be sure to bring a neatly wrapped copy of your manuscript. Ring the bell, hold it up, and tell them, “It’s the bomb.” They might misunderstand you at first, but trust me – the two of you will be laughing over that story for years.

2) But what if their address isn’t listed, and they somehow lost you at the airport after the last convention? Well, that’s what e-mail is for. Just be sure to send them your manuscript in full, as an attachment, with the title of your work in capital letters: VAMPIRE VIRUS.

3) Authors are often hesitant about promoting their work, so never hesitate to do it for them. A good start would be to tell all the book clubs and reading groups within a hundred miles that the author is not only going to be doing a free workshop at your local library, but that they’ll be handing out copies of their books as well. Then e-mail the author your great idea and not to worry, you’ve got it all set up, with at least a thousand eager fans already pledging to show. They’ll be so impressed with your promotional skills, they won’t know what to say.

4) Some writers are able to get successful authors to write blurbs for their books before the books are published. Don’t settle for that. Send them your book before you even finish it. That way they’ll not only be dying to find out what happens next, but they’ll be sure to help you write it. And what better way for two writing buddies to work together than for them to invite you for a sleepover? Then they’re guaranteed to bring you on their next book tour ‘cause they’ve not only seen so much of your brilliance, but they know you’re great at backrubs.

5) Finally, if you happened to have named all six of your pigs after the author’s characters, do not tell the author. That will only mark you an amateur. To be truly noticed, you’ll have to have named all six of your children. Once you go that far, you can’t just switch your loyalty to some other author when they suddenly get famous (at least not without a lot of paperwork).

But if it does come to that, don’t be afraid to adapt to the times. And if Hermione’s friends don’t understand why she now has to be called Katniss, just move to another town. Like Forks.

Maine Character will be signing screenshots of his guest post at Mister Bagel on Tuesday night. He would like to thank his friends there, as well as Tahereh, for their good humor and encouragement, and would like his favorite authors to not be afraid of him if he should happen to send them a note.

GUEST POST: On Being a "Real" Writer

2011-02-07T00:00:00.000-08:00

By: Robyn Bradley

When did I know I wanted to be a writer? I can trace it back to Mrs. Shea’s fourth grade class when she gave us a short story assignment. As I sat at my desk drafting the piece, first in pencil and then rewriting it in ink, I knew. As I read it aloud to my classmates, I knew. As I proudly beamed at the three red stars Mrs. Shea put at the top, I knew.

But it was more than simply knowing I wanted to be a writer. In that brief moment in Mrs. Shea's class, I was a writer. There was something magical about the connection — pen to paper, me to my audience, my audience to me. I was hooked. I wanted to do this, to be this, for the rest of my life.

Of course, that little girl grew up and the child's vision did as well. At some point in my twenties, my dream morphed into a more mature aspiration: landing an agent and a book deal. Simply writing stories for an audience was a nice sentiment, but those other two things? Well. An agent and a book deal would make me a real writer.

So off I went. After a detour in radio, I did some freelancing, started my own copywriting business, and wrote and wrote. My work appeared a few times in small places you’ve probably never heard of. I received very encouraging rejection letters, personalized and welcoming from agents and editors alike. I even won a short story award. But that big prize — an agent, a book deal — never happened. I'd hear about people going the self-publishing route, but I knew that wouldn't satisfy my needs. How could it? To me, self-publishing was a last ditch effort to get published when you probably weren't worthy of it to begin with. And so I plowed on, the dream still there, but growing a little dimmer with each passing year.

Until recently.

This past summer, I was re-reading one of my all-time favorite writing books: Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott. In the section on publishing, Lamott borrows a quote from the movie Cool Runnings about the Jamaican bobsled team where the coach says, “If you’re not enough before the gold medal, you won’t be enough with it.”

In essence, Lamott explained, “being enough” has to start from within. I’d lost sight of that, thinking instant validation would come with the agent and book deal. But the truth is, it wouldn’t. Validation had occurred years before in fourth grade when I quietly and without much fanfare realized I already was a writer.

At the same time I had this epiphany, I'd just bought a Nook and started hearing about the success many self-published writers, like Joe Konrath and Amanda Hocking, were experiencing, thanks to this new digital age and the ease of self-publishing platforms like Amazon's Kindle Direct Publishing. And so I began to think, "Well, why not self-publish my stories to Kindles and Nooks and put them directly in my readers' hands? I might not have an agent's blessing or a publishing house backing me, but I believe in my stories."

Okay, so even typing that sounds a little, well, presumptuous. And I have a feeling those damn doubt monkeys who whisper in my ear at night will always try to mess with my inner validation. But whenever they do (and whenever anyone else does), that's when I'll take a deep breath and remember fourth grade and the moment I discovered this truth (even if I didn't fully appreciate it at the time): whether I self publish, traditionally publish, or sky-write my words across the deep blue yonder, I already am a real writer.

Robyn Bradley is a Copy Queen by Day and Novelist Ninja by night. She’d love to connect with you on Facebook and you can learn more about her on her website.

HOBBITS ARE RACIST

2011-01-30T21:37:00.000-08:00

happy monday everyone!

SO I FOUND RACIST HOBBITS THIS WEEKEND.

yes, that's right. hobbits! racist! @tanagandhi & @razberry28 and i were strolling along rather innocently, searching for a place to eat, when LO AND BEHOLD, we come upon a restaurant called The Hobbit. color us intrigued, dear friends. COLOR US INTRIGUED. we decided we would give The Hobbit a chance. we decided we would DINE at The Hobbit. we decided we would give The Hobbit our hard-earned monies in exchange for the satiation of our hunger!

AND YET! WE COULDN'T FIND A WAY INSIDE.

The Hobbit had a very distinct (and rather beautiful) entryway -- secluded, covered in vines, stained glass windows and a set of very deep, dark wood doors. business hours stated that The Hobbit was open for hungry travelers! but, alas, the doors were sealed shut. there was a piece of paper taped to the adjacent brick wall that said the main entrance was around back, and that we should "Ring the bell for assistance."

BUT THERE WAS NO BACK ENTRANCE TO BE FOUND.

we rounded and rounded the building to no avail until we noticed small, crumbly looking windows (PERFECT FOR SMALL, CRUMBLY HOBBITS!) and one tiny-looking door (PERFECT FOR TINY-LOOKING HOBBITS!) about an inch from the ground, smudged with dirt and decay. and upon closer inspection? we noticed a pair of storm cellar doors surrounded by dead shrubbery, seemingly useless and entirely clamped shut. the doors were half-covered by an old sign with the words "The Hobbit" emblazoned across the wooden plank.

we assumed this was the back entrance the earlier note was referring to.

AND THEN WE RAN FOR OUR LIVES.

upon reflection, we discovered three things:

1. Hobbits definitely exist.

2. Hobbits are the sketchiest creatures ever.

3. HOBBITS ARE TOTALLY RACIST on account of their not allowing regular human-sized people into their restaurants, and also because of this:

actual photo taken with actual camera not belonging to a hobbit.

ahem.

how was YOUR weekend?

------

UPDATE: i kid you not, dear friends, WITHIN MINUTES of me posting this? someone from New Zealand (NEW ZEALAND IS TOTES HOBBIT COUNTRY, JUST FYI) searched keywords "The Hobbit" and came across my blog. if this isn't proof that hobbits are now watching and tracking my every move, i don't know what is.

evidence:

A ROYAL PAIN IN MY TITLE

2011-01-27T22:45:00.000-08:00

SO.
TITLES.

how do we feel about them? are they effective? insignificant? important enough to agonize over?
sometimes titles present themselves almost magically. other times? not so much.

oh, Eleanor. this was a bad idea.

how do YOU decide on a title for your book?
and, if you're willing, why not share the title of your own manuscript/WIP/SNI?

HAPPY FRIDAY, DEAR FRIENDS!

i hope your weekend is filled to the brim with daffodils.

<3

I HOPE JUSTIN BIEBER'S HAIR EATS YOU FOR BREAKFAST

2011-01-17T19:05:00.000-08:00

TOTALLY BLOGGING FROM A ZILLION FEET IN THE AIR RIGHT NOW AND IT'S TOTALLY BLOWING MY MIND SO INCREDIBLEEEEEEEE OMG OMG HYPERVENTILATION

(LOOK MOM, I'M FLYING!!!)

okay, so, if i didn't already mention it, I AM ON A PLANE, IN THE SKY, SITTING IN A CHAIR, IN THE PLANE, IN THE SKY (IN THE SKY!!!) (STILL TOTALLY IN THE SKY!) on my way back to the 80 degree weather of Southern California.

and for the first time ever, i think i now finally understand why it's so annoying to hear people say things like OMG 80 DEGREE WEATHER IN JANUARY YOU'RE SO JEALOUS HAHAHA JK JK I'M SURE NORTH DAKOTA FEELS GOOD TOO LMAO JK JK when you're trapped in freezing temperatures. that is kind of how i felt today.

i mean, don't get me wrong, i definitely love the cold (WHERE ELSE TO WEAR ALL MY COATS AND BOOTS, HMMMM?) but when you lose feeling in all of your extremities and open up your twitter account in an accidental attempt to open up the MAP application on your phone (BECAUSE YOU ARE DESPERATELY SEEKING SHELTER FROM THE COLD AND HOPING SOMEONE WILL SERVE YOU AN ABSURDLY EXCELLENT LATTE VERY VERY SOON) only to read tweets like, "OH HEE HEE GOING TO THE BEACH TODAY! TOTES WORKING ON MY TAN TODAY! GOD IT'S SO WARM TODAY! HEE HEE SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA LET'S GET MARRIAGED AND HAVE SUNNY LITTLE BABIES WHILE WE SIP SELTZER WATER BY THE BAY TODAY HEE HEE!" this is what i am literally thinking:

i hope Justin Bieber's hair eats you for breakfast.

so it is my promise to you, dear friends, that i will never ever again be that person, not even accidentally, because those tweets are CRUEL! AND COLD! AND CRUEL!

and anyway, i still like the cold.

ANYHOW! i will (hopefully soon) write up a snazzy blogpost about NYC adventures (OF WHICH THERE WERE MANY! and so EXCITING! and HEY OMG DID I MENTION I'M IN THE SKY?? I KNOW! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT EITHER!) but seeing as how i'm currently in the sky, i have to focus on that element of my life right now. it's kind of a lot of pressure to have internet access in the sky. it's like i need to do something really profound right about now. like maybe invent something. or discover a planet. or, you know, eat a lot of Skittles. all while IN THE SKY

SO I WILL LEAVE YOU WITH THIS VIDEO.
because it is hilarious. and also because i am sitting in a chair IN THE SKYYYYYYYYYY

EEEEEEEEEEEEEE

STILL FLYINGGGGGGGGGGGG

<3

5 REALLY EXCITING WAYS TO USE A SEMICOLON

2011-01-04T22:15:00.000-08:00

YOUR IMAGINATION IS LIKE DARTH VADER

2011-01-03T23:56:00.000-08:00

the imagination is a wonderful thing.

the imagination is a spectacular little treasure as long as it's helping us write our books. as long as we're typing away like crazy people, locked up in our rooms, trying to convince the cats and the kids to leave us alone long enough to finish a sentence, the imagination enables us to live in an alternate universe without ever having to be abducted by aliens. it teaches us how to expand our horizons -- how to see past the confines of human limitations -- without ever resorting to hard drugs! we are superhuman! prodigal! we write books! we read books!

we are a special breed, indeed.
sometimes we rhyme without even intending to.

and yet. despite its many splendid ways, the human imagination has a dark side. it's like Darth Vader showing up to your 16th birthday party wearing a unicorn mask and you totally think he's a unicorn until he's all LUKE, I AM YOUR FATHER* and i definitely didn't pay child support all these years so maybe don't tell anyone about this? and you're so shocked he's not a unicorn that you fail to point out that your name isn't even Luke.

the imagination is tricky like that.

sure, maybe you see glimpses of the dark side of your imagination while you're writing the book, but the moment you finish? the moment you finish the book is the moment your imagination really turns on you. all of a sudden it's cutting off your arm with this weird laser sword and talking to you in this breathy robotic voice about your origins and you're screaming (maybe because of the arm thing, not sure) and it all kind of spirals downward from there.

your imagination is shouting things like YOUR BOOK SUCKS! and NO ONE WILL LOVE YOU! this isn't a business, IT'S TOTALLY PERSONAL! and here are ALL OF THE THINGS i've imagined people will say about how much YOUR BOOK SUCKS! and it totally sucks DID I MENTION THAT YET?

and then you'll fight it off and fight it off and then you'll send your manuscript to beta readers and then what? then the imagination is back again! imagining in your mind exactly how horrible your writing really is and just how much your beta readers hate your book and OMG YOU FORGOT TO PUT A PLOT IN THE STORY and before you know it your head is stuffed full of nonsense and ridiculousness and everything feels sticky.

and you'll fight it off.

and then it comes time for revision and there you go again, imagining things that have nothing to do with the success of your novel. suddenly you're imagining how you'll never be able to fix this book, how you'll never be able to edit it properly, how you'll never land an agent or a book deal and then you imagine yourself alone in your neighbors' attic, surrounded by 27 cats who all fall asleep on your face one night and suffocate you in your sleep. all because of your imagination.

and then you fight it off.

and then you have an agent and your imagination freaks you the hell out about being on submission and you can't sleep or eat or use the bathroom anymore and things are really starting to get uncomfortable and you don't know what to do so you just imagine some more. and you imagine so much that you never fall asleep and then you wake up exhausted and spend the day imagining what it would be like to sleep and THIS STUPID IMAGINATION JUST WON'T LEAVE YOU THE HELL ALONE

and then you realize you and your imagination need to be in an open relationship where you are actively seeing other people, namely your therapist and your priest.

IT'S TIME TO SCHEDULE AN INTERVENTION.

i've seen a lot of writers go through this -- we've all gone through this.
but i want to remind you that you can imagine anything in the world.
which means that you can imagine yourself imagining away your fear, too.

happy tuesday, my friends.

don't be afraid of your imagination.
don't be afraid to be awesome.

also i hope you sucker punch your imagination in the eyeball.

<3

*okay, so i actually watched this part of the movie? and he doesn't even say, "Luke, I am your father." he just says, "I am your father." so i don't know where the "Luke" part of this famous line came from.